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Confessions....


horner_boi

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Well, thats shit.

Thread is going abit off topic, we need confessions.

Stuff like wanking on a bus, playing with your bum or wearing your mums underwear or summat lol.

Come on, get tellin em!

ive farted several times and blamed it on peoples dogs.

also totally blagged that i worked high up for a property developer to some bird when i was 17,and that id just bought a house in town on behalf of my boss and i was staying there, in some bullcrap story, i then rang me mate who had a free house, swung him a 10er to leave a key under the mat, and have all the lights turned off in the house for when i got back, took her upstairs and ended up kippin in his mum and dads bed, then left pretty sharpish in the morning, and made up some bullcrap story about working back home the week after as an excuse to not see her again, one of the few times ive got away with bullcrappin my way through a date when ratted.

as opposed to all the times ive tried and failed "my names terry and im a concorde pilot" is one of my most popular ploys when out drinkin.

ive also had a 2litre bottle full of petrol before for carrying on the motorbikes in a ruck sack, and seen my mate going to take a swig out of it when he came to mine before we headed out, i could of told him but decided not too.

other confessions include on the caravan site where me mum owns a van, my mates lil bro stashs his booze in my shed, i constantly swap it for anything, sambuca for water,whisky for apple juice.

naughty confessions include gettin a handjob in a club while getting into a bird, and while she was doing this, i was waving me hands above me head, making wanking motions, and pointing down.

also had a conversation on the phone with my mother about the mess id left the kitchen in, while recieving a blow job.

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hey dont call me gay, and i really cant tell you who it is, as for her being hiv positive and having a boyfriend i said "callum, you do realise shes in a relationship" to which he replied "kev, listen boyfriends just a word and no one will be able to resist the charm of HASMS". but i swore to him i wouldnt tell anyone, i know ive kinda broken this promise, but i m hoping to keep him anonymous

Hahahahahahahahahahaha

All I can say is, I'm dead proud, I've taught him well! Callum I love you!

Davey

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