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The 'i'm Such A Goon I Just...' Thread


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Threw a load of washing in yesterday, put the conditioner stuff in and we have these big tablets you put in your washing draw...and theres 2 in a pack. I got one out but they were tightly wrapped and one got stuck, so I sort of pinched it and tried to pull it out, when all of a sudden the tablet exploded in my face.

Loads of it went in my eyes, mouth, nose and hair. It actually took me down to the floor. The pain was unreal, I felt around for a towel, wet it and put my face on it (by which time my eyes and nose were burning up). Eventually my mum came downstairs and washed my eyes out, which made it hurt more and more.

Eventually, after about 20 minutes I was left with very, very sore and bloodshot eyes so I went to lie down. Got up this morning and they were fine, I can still see, which is always a bonus in the morning.

Lesson: Don't squeeze washing tablets.

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i just had a massive argument with the person that was going to pay for my 18th, got some but kissing to do...

Lolololol, im such a goon, I let some guy from school drive my car, he has passed his test and has traders insurance as his dad owns a garage. Anyways, he got in, thought he was a F1 driver, cained it off up the road, saw the corner coming, braked uber hard, and missed a tree by millimetres...I have never been so scared in my life. I went nuts at him.

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bled my maggie in the bathroom. now there's maggie blood all over the sink and walls, tyre marks everywhere, mud from tyres mixed with water and blood, etc.

proper nice place to bleed it, loads of water and things to wipe off on, and good light.

meh.

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Just set my hand on fire whilst being silly with combustion.

There's a hole in this lunch box type plastic container in my room, so i decided to spray lynx under it and make all the vapour go into it. Lit the hole and nothing happened, so what do i do? Pick the b*****d thing up and have a 70cm by 70cm fireball nearly set my room and hair on fire and burn my hand!

My hand hurts :(

DO NOT DO THIS!

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  • 2 weeks later...

Necrobump (Y)

I'm usch a goon i forgot that it was a screwdriver in my cannon, not a potato, shot it at about 45* out of my garden, can't see any ambulances over where it must have landed.

I'm such a goon i just found out what getting launched means, was doing some skids on the field on my minimoto and i opted for a turning type skid, got launched about 6 ft!

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