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Whats In Your, "what Not To Do" Book?


downhill_rob2@hotmail.com

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don't put the screwball scramble ball bearing in your mouth.

Ive done that, and many other marbles, Marbles were made forp laying marbles, Not putting in mouths.

Check your mates not standing behind you when you go to serve in tennis (Stitches in eyebrows)

Don't think you can ride on paths 15 minutes after learning to ride a bike on grass, I hadnt quite mastered brakes and hit the front of my head on a wall corner by a neighbours gate.

Realise that when your on a shitty plastic see-saw that moves round the garden when your on it, can end up in going over to a step.... Glued back of head.

Edit: When mashing up mud in your garden, with a garden fork, Know where your feet are and how close the fork is >_<

Don't step on bee's with bare feet.

Edited by T-MAGura
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never tell your teacher your diabetic... its a hard thing to keep her beleiving you are lmao! my mate done that... haha, was funny!

haha.. Why would you do that?!

You know, people with diabetes can eat candy too, as "normal" people. Unless you have version 2.

answer my question though.. why? :lol:

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haha.. Why would you do that?!

You know, people with diabetes can eat candy too, as "normal" people. Unless you have version 2.

answer my question though.. why? :lol:

I said i was diabetic so i could eat through her lessons and get out early if i needed to ect.. she soon asked the bloody headteacher though, i got excluded for 3 days for lieing and taking 12 hours of her lessons off :(lol lmao, i was such a bass ass in year 8 lmao! :P

Candy... hehe

Edited by terror-error
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I said i was diabetic so i could eat through her lessons and get out early if i needed to ect.. she soon asked the bloody headteacher though, i got excluded for 3 days for lieing and taking 12 hours of her lessons off :(lol lmao, i was such a bass ass in year 8 lmao! :P

Candy... hehe

thought you said it was your mate...

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dont throw a banger at ur m8, it ends up with them gtn burned and anoyed wid you oh and they cant hear for about half an hour

dont think your tiger woods and try and drive a golf ball when you should be putting it, it ends up with your mum having a broken noes

dont hit ur sister in the nose with a tap spanner (that u found under a seat) for no reason

lol theres some mental people on this forum lmao

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Dont use a drill as a hand held milling machine....idiot....

Circular saw blades are sharp and you dont need to see how sharp by putting your finger in whilst its running

Never trust a women driver (sorry but they just think they're never wrong) Have a story if anyone challenges it

Think before you speak and don't think about sex all the time lol

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dont try to trackstand next to your friends mums greenhouse..... people do fall over and people do get hurt!!!

is that my greenhouse your chatting of?

if i remember rightly it was the only piece of glass that hadnt been changed to plastic lol.

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Dont chill in you best mates bedroom and when his milf of a mom walks in and asks him something you come out with ide do you. Look on her face didnt go down to well.

Dont think your tarzen climbing a huge f**k off tree jumping out into the next one thinking the thin branch will hold.

Dont tell your year 9 10 11 super fit english teacher she has nice eyes while looking at her breasts she will soon smile and say beau your a tad young. dam her lol

Do not let your dad say Beau ill give you 20 pound if you can hold your hand on that bit of sand for 10 seconds just after he has moved a bbq and the sad is around 600 degrees. Soon find out you hand looks lie ka ballon.

Dont pour wierd milk ( something like dissolving milk) over girls heads because she said your a twat, Her highlights go a nice green colour.

Dont think its good to throw paint thinner up you house then a mach at it

Drain pipes to burn and they do melt.

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dont throw a banger at ur m8, it ends up with them gtn burned and anoyed wid you oh and they cant hear for about half an hour

dont think your tiger woods and try and drive a golf ball when you should be putting it, it ends up with your mum having a broken noes

dont hit ur sister in the nose with a tap spanner (that u found under a seat) for no reason

lol theres some mental people on this forum lmao

How the f**k did you get validated??

Never think you're in the SAS and throw an airsoft stun grenade through a christian manor building thing's window. Lots of smoke and 4 deafening bangs :lol:

HAHAHAHAHA!!!

Thats f**king class.

I want some smoke grenades so i can test out the gas mask and see if it works.

Throw them into a room with chavs, run in, do damage, run out and noone will have known what happened...

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How the f**k did you get validated??

HAHAHAHAHA!!!

Thats f**king class.

I want some smoke grenades so i can test out the gas mask and see if it works.

Throw them into a room with chavs, run in, do damage, run out and noone will have known what happened...

through a banga at a mod i spoze.

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dont ever drink too much gin and beer at a party when u are young and not used to alcohol.

Shit the bed big style in your sleep.

And leave it for your mum to clean up while u feel ill at work.

arghh that was a goodun

(Y)

I threw up in my ex gfs mums car once. she wasnt impressed even after i sent her flowers and cleaned it out myself.

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never ever when cold,and bored, and feeling like having some fun. open your microwave up. stick to forks in the door catches, so it thinks its open, whack it on for 8 minutes, then turn it on. its just not wise, sparks tend to randomly fly off random metal objects, of which there are many in the kitchen, including the door handle to get out of the kitchen.

never ever think it would be amusing to swim in lake vyrnwy when theres 4 inches of snow on the ground, for s**ts and giggles. it may of been a good idea. had your mates not thought it would be funny to throw your clothes in the lake and fill your trainers with snow, also for s**ts and giggles.

never ever ride a motorboard at 35mph down a gravel track.while not wearing a helmet. a sheep will run off scared and startle you, although you initially control the wobble you get, and end up kind of carving from side to side for a few seconds. your back end will give way. and you will end up hittin head on said gravel track, rear of cranium first. all will appear fine at first. but at 11pm that night, while sessioning some DH game on PS2. you will lose your ability to speak in logical sentences, not only will this appear funny.and possibly be damaging to your mental health. it takes great difficulty to tell your mates of this problem, due to you being incapable of speaking in coherent sentences.

other than those 3 exact situations. in those exact places. at those exact speeds, its all good.

also, might wanna give beastality a miss. never wish to have anything(fingers, erotic toys,penis etc) inserted into my rectum. its one of the few occasions i would raise a hand to a woman. its just sooo wrong.

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never ever when cold,and bored, and feeling like having some fun. open your microwave up. stick to forks in the door catches, so it thinks its open, whack it on for 8 minutes, then turn it on. its just not wise, sparks tend to randomly fly off random metal objects, of which there are many in the kitchen, including the door handle to get out of the kitchen.

never ever think it would be amusing to swim in lake vyrnwy when theres 4 inches of snow on the ground, for s**ts and giggles. it may of been a good idea. had your mates not thought it would be funny to throw your clothes in the lake and fill your trainers with snow, also for s**ts and giggles.

never ever ride a motorboard at 35mph down a gravel track.while not wearing a helmet. a sheep will run off scared and startle you, although you initially control the wobble you get, and end up kind of carving from side to side for a few seconds. your back end will give way. and you will end up hittin head on said gravel track, rear of cranium first. all will appear fine at first. but at 11pm that night, while sessioning some DH game on PS2. you will lose your ability to speak in logical sentences, not only will this appear funny.and possibly be damaging to your mental health. it takes great difficulty to tell your mates of this problem, due to you being incapable of speaking in coherent sentences.

other than those 3 exact situations. in those exact places. at those exact speeds, its all good.

also, might wanna give beastality a miss. never wish to have anything(fingers, erotic toys,penis etc) inserted into my rectum. its one of the few occasions i would raise a hand to a woman. its just sooo wrong.

that cracks me up.

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Don't think its a laugh to intimidate police cars and helicopters by 'pretending to break the law' right infront/below them...

Dont down vodka at your granma's party, run around her pond several times to get it going and then come back indoors, lie on the floor infront of everyone and begin to tell them about how much you fancy your maths teacher...(Don't worry, I didn't fancy her at all...I actually wanted to stab her in the face).

Don't hit stones with tennis racketts towards the teachers car park...

Make sure you fully examine christmas presents for your mum when buying from Lush...I bought a 'Lovers Bath' with several 'inviting' gestures written all over it.

Always delete text messages before meeting your missus.

Never invite random strangers into your house for a party when your pissed.

Dont try to steal your friends car that has a keycode immobilizer...which means you can't even attempt to start the car for another 24 hours. :)

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