Teenage Angst Communal Agony Aunt Thread

[Fish-Finger-er]

HELLPPP!!

I think I'm about lose the girl I want. Last nights party was a sign to me that she doesn't like my physically or mentally anymore.

ANY IDEAS ?! - Flowers - Chocolates. I have £40... ANYTHING!

I can't bare to loose her!

chillax, its to late, you've already lost her, if she don't like you mentally or physically as you put it, £40 ain't gunna change that.

money cant buy you love, money can buy you an hour with a female escort called sally Anne whose interests include.....

nah seriously if she don't like you, a box of flowers or a bouquet of chocolates wont change anything. just move on. seems harsh but its true.

your sitting there at 15 thinking you want to be with her for the rest of your life, but chances are it aint gunna happen. im 19, and i know any girl i meet now, chances are they aint going to be my life partner, you might as well lose her now without any harsh feelings than in 6 months time when she sleeps with your mate at a house party you couldnt make due to having work the next morning.

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QUOTE(b @ Apr 29 2007, 12:26 PM) ←

Her excuse for not wanting to see a doc was that she didnt like him which i guess is understandable if your a girl in that situation but im still in two minds, dont know what to do..text her?

been in a similar situation, only i wasnt with another bird at the time, the old one just wanted me back, but i was 95% sure she was lying

talk to your new bird about it, say that you think shes making it up to drive a wedge between the 2 of you, but your not that much of a heartless b*****d to totally blank her in case she is pregnant.(should win kudos points with her).trying to keep it a secret is not a good idea

dont take no crap over it, quite frankly if i was about to squeeze out a 8lb crying, puking,bundle of joy with no control over his own bladder, i couldnt care if the doctor smelt of cheese. wore tweed jackets,watched countdown and i hated him with a pashion, id still want his advice as hes still a doctor. otherwise drag her kicking and screaming to your famil planning centre, as its confidential impartial advice.

next port of call,(even if you still think shes lying) find out if she plans on keeping it, if she doesnt, it kinda makes no odds, tell your new girlfriend this, ask her if it wud be ok to offer her some support through this time, as technically its kind of your fault(Cant see shell object, as shes mates with her too).

if she says shes going to keep it, then youve got a couple of options.

youve got the option of saying your well willing to be a father for the kid and adopt it(can go tits up if its true).

or the way i did it, after getting this advice off a much older and wiser friend, who told me not to use the above way, incase it is all true.

meet her one day after work, tell her you want to talk with her, can you walk with her for a bit, be as nice as pie, no matter how much you hate the bitch, tell her the 2 of you are going somewhere. when she asks where, tell her your both going to her parents house now, and your going to tell them together, that your going to be parents. (shes got no excuse for this bit, as if she dont want you involved with the kid, why is she even telling you in the first place. shes got to tell her parents at some point, and if she wants you as part of the babies life, youve got a right to be there as well, she cant argue with any of that).

with any luck shell break down in tears and admit shes lying, if not you go to her parents house and you tell her together, she wont be able to keep it up in front of her parents, for sure, theyll know when shes lying. if it gets past this stage, and the parents fall for it(or indeed shes telling the truth) it goes down 1 of 2 roads whether its true or not.

1) her parents accept it, welcome you as a father etc, and dont go mad, if thats the case, if shes lying shell be forked off by you, her mates, her mum and dad, and people will think more of you because of the way you stood there and dealt with it sensibly and maturely and wernt nasty or vindictive etc. if shes telling the truth, then youve done the right thing, yea, your locked into a life of teenage parenting, but youve already made the mistake.

2)her parents kick the shit into you. if this happens, people will stand up for you, your mates, other responsible adults etc, not cos its an adult beating up a kid, but because you where the big man, responsible, mature etc, doing the right thing, rather than running off, and they beat you up.

if shes then tellin the truth, then its the same situation as the first one, youve done the right thing, but youve already made the mistake, and if you want to get away, youve got more of an excuse as her parents want your cajones on a plate. or youll get an apology off her parents

if shes lying, then once again, her parents etc will go mental at her, same as her mates and you, and most likely her parents will owe you a massive apology for reacting the way they did.

its the easiest way to rat her out, whilst looking like the sensible mature man. and if it all turns out to be true, youve still been the sensible mature man, doing the right thing

[Wrayvon]

Blah Blah

Woah someone has too much time on their hands

Hehe!

[b'mouth trials]

Woah someone has too much time on their hands

Hehe!

Id put it down as someone being an absolute legend interested in helping someone who is really shitting themselves...(not a dig by the way, dam internet)

Trialspunk.

I really appreciate the help, i took her to the junction which is kinda a place for thatr kinda thing today but we were to late so we are going back tomorrow and ill definatley get a test done then and then see what happens from there.

Im still in two equal minds as to whether she is lieing or not, there are signs to support both.

How did it turn out for you?

Anyway, we should see what happens tomorrow i guess...

Cheers guys, Aaron.

[Fish-Finger-er]

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QUOTE(b @ Apr 30 2007, 11:22 PM) ←

Id put it down as someone being an absolute legend interested in helping someone who is really shitting themselves...(not a dig by the way, dam internet)

Trialspunk.

I really appreciate the help, i took her to the junction which is kinda a place for thatr kinda thing today but we were to late so we are going back tomorrow and ill definatley get a test done then and then see what happens from there.

Im still in two equal minds as to whether she is lieing or not, there are signs to support both.

How did it turn out for you?

Anyway, we should see what happens tomorrow i guess...

Cheers guys, Aaron.

the bitch was lying to get me back, i was 99% certain of this, so was more than willin to use the bullshit ill adopt the kid approach, but if your not so sure, the lets go tell the parents is a lot safer bet, and with very few bad possible outcomes(unless u count gettin beaten up a bad outcome, but as its par for the course for most saturday nights, a black eye in the week aint gunna do you no damage.) other ways, youll find especially when your kinda 18 and below, is friendships should count for the world, but most of the time, there only fake friendships, go to some of her girl mates, i wouldnt say turn them against you, but chat to them, be genuinely nice, if there not in on it, theylll more than likely support you, if there not in on it, if they think you shouldnt be going through this, they may tell you, if not, her mates aint gunna be as shit hot at the pretending game as she is, they may slip up first.

most girls who are girlfriend material are arseholes, those that arent arseholes, generally dont tend to be girlfriend material, or are way to high up the chain to be "your girlfriend" material. obiviously theres a few exceptions, but on the whole, the amount of girls i know, or have seen, playing guys, for money,drinks,cheap nights out, presents, phones, even cars and motorbikes,is unbelievable.

suppose this has technically given me a girl problem, in the last 3 years, i havent had a relationship longer than 6 weeks, yet have had more sexual partners than pretty much all of my mates. hasnt really been a problem, im only 19, no need to settle down yet. but its starting to give me issues, ive got female mates, who ive been mates with for years, some of whom ive fancied for like 5 years, but never done anything, as its just not been worth the hassle. some of these girls i really really like, as friends, and in a sexual way. things are starting to get awkward now, were all going out gettin drunk together all goin back to one house, kipping ther once weve drank all the drinks. so far ive been lucky and aint ended up doing anything with any of these close female friends, but can see it will happen, i like them, they seem to like me, were both drunk, so on and so forth. but it gives me a dilemma, there too much of a good friend to just have casual sex with, and see them to much as it is to not have a relationship with them if we started sleeping together, but i know, deep down,if im honest, no matter how much i fancy them, 8 weeks from now, ill want a change, not neccessary a change of partners, but couldnt hack a relationship with anyone, for a long amount of time, i just get bored, and hate being tied down. just dont quite know what to do, theres the tell the female mates this, but then they already know me, and know this, and the thing is, right now i want a relationship, but i know 2-3 months down the line i wont, and so on.im kind of scootin round it at the moment, by either goin home after we finished drinking, sleeping in a chair on my own, or just falling straight asleep with someone, or sleeping with someone i dont know all that well(which has got me into a big mess in the past, as some of you know.).

grrrr... enter into a relationship i want, but know wont last. (and end up upsettin people).

refuse to start seeing them on the ground their mates(but i do really like them, and perhaps have them feel a bit rejected).

tell them i just want something casual(And seem like a total slag)

meh, got a bender away from home coming up this weekend, ill decide after that i think

[Fishy]

Kev, you've always got me and Callum.

[Nick Garland]

Got a problem myself, broke up with my g/f on tuesday, more of a mutual thing.

Basically something was not exaclty right so I confronted her about it and she was saying about her going to manchester uni being a slight problem because of the long distance, a relative died and that gave her a hard time as her mum expected her to do more around the house and also with exams coming up she felt a bit stressed.

So I said to her "do you want to break it off whilst we are still friends" the reply being, no, maybe, im not sure then yes. She started to cry but not too much in college.

Anyway we been talking as good mates and spoke to her today and mentioned how my mates mum did not like her as we broke up and she said "if you did not pressure it we probaboly wouldnt have broken up and still be together", this happened today being friday. She said how she had really missed me the past few nights and stuff. Then when she left she went to kiss me and realised we apart so dived to my cheek.

I got the impression she wanted to get back together so I am hopefully going over there tomorrow to talk to her about it. I asked 4 mates and family what they though, all 4 mates said I should get back with her, so did my parents but my sister was the only one to say "give it a break"

I do not want to leave it too long before we both move on and what we had was lost, I am tempted to get back with her as theres another 4/5 months till we go to uni and we really got on so well, no petty arguments etc and I enjoyed spending time with her.

Anyone else been in this situation if so what did you do? if not what should I do?

I do not normally ask for help like this on a forum so no harsh replies

[Davetrials]

if ur going uni in a few months id leave it, ull grow much closer over those few months and u may have to split again cause of the distance

anbd it would kill u both.

[Greetings]

Just a question really...

Does anybody on this forum find it difficult to get a girlfriend because most girls:

-are too thick

-boring as hell

-or ugly

-have no hobby

-want us to spend all our time with them

-think sports are tiring

-sit around doing nothing

-are constantly on a diet and love talking about it

-or don't like to talk and are dead serious about everything

etc.?

Or is there something wrong with me lol

I find most girls I've met throughout the last year highly unattractive in one way or another. And just to make things worse, all the lovely girls I've met are engaged. Geez I want to be 17 again... it's an awesome age in every way. Time travel me

edit i mean a proper gf, not a sex doll or whatever you call them

Edited May 4, 2007 by Inur

[JT!]

I think the trouble is most people meet girls in bars and pubs.

[Fish-Finger-er]

Just a question really...

Does anybody on this forum find it difficult to get a girlfriend because most girls:

list,

etc.?

Or is there something wrong with me lol

I find most girls I've met throughout the last year highly unattractive in one way or another. And just to make things worse, all the lovely girls I've met are engaged. Geez I want to be 17 again... it's an awesome age in every way. Time travel me

edit i mean a proper gf, not a sex doll or whatever you call them

inur, i dont know wether its just me(and possibly you) or whether a huge number of people are unhappy with there GF's but keep it quiet. but ive yet to meet a girl who i think"yea id like to spend more than a couple of months with you". i even look at mates girlfriends and think "if i was al/bill/reginald/steven/margaret, id be well annoyed with you because....., or id of split with you because.... "

theres plenty of cool sex dolls, but then the lack of hobby or constantly being on a diet things etc, dont really come into, its looks and what there like to talk to on a base level, without any of this hobbies, life plans, careers etc thrown in whic youd want for a long term partner.

ive only ever met 2 girls who ive thought "yea your pretty much perfect, id well make sexy time with you and not move on", but ive known the one 8 months, after knowing her 2 months she was perfect, but was her about 3-4 weeks ago, and i no longer find her physically attractive, which puts a big cross in box number one, and would mean she wouldnt of been a safe bet.

the other is, still to me perfect, ive known her a few months, cant fault a single thing about her really, but shes kinda into the rock scene, and think would me mother be impressed, would she get rid of her piercings for the wedding and the like, and still only know her as a mate,and even then not a proper good mate, just the odd night in the pub talking and chance meetings in town etc. not what shed be like in a relationship. but sure being with her on a daily basis id soon find annoying flaws and habits that would annoy me. actually now i think of it, ive already found some, she smokes,not that it annoys me, but dont want to be saying i do to an iron lung, or having me house stink of smoke, she also doesnt really get along with girls that well, well she does with a few of her female mates, but generally she dont, meaning could see her falling out with a load of my other female mates.

so thanks inur, youve ruined that one for me too. so now down at zero again.

nah seriously i dont know what it is, i know im not a looker and should probably have lower standards for a relationship, and mates have told me this"why did you get rid of her she was mint, you wont be able to do better etc" but then i think if i dont want to be with them why should i be, and i cant drop my standards for happiness. which is what relationships should all be about.

and JT as for meetin girls in bars and pubs, your kinda right, but then its kinda one of the only places a man working in a male environment will meet girls, apart from occasionally meeting them shopping or in town or summit and gettin chat through friends of friends, but then first dates normally a pub or a bar. also as most of us, our social scene is pubs, bars,clubs and wondering who you are on a sunday morning, we aint going to get into a relationship with a girl who doesnt at least touch on this scene, as we wont have much in common, if she dont come out to pubs and bars, i sure as hell aint going to stop going out seeing my friends in pubs,bars and clubs for a girl.

[Token]

nah seriously i dont know what it is, i know im not a looker and should probably have lower standards for a relationship, and mates have told me this"why did you get rid of her she was mint, you wont be able to do better etc" but then i think if i dont want to be with them why should i be, and i cant drop my standards for happiness. which is what relationships should all be about.

Now your older than me and probally got alot more experience, but from what I've heard from girls, they love confidence. If you don't feel comfortable with yourself, or shy away then apparently thats the worst thing. Although I've also heard that they go crazy for you if give them the silent treatment for abit. So confidence and silent treatment every now and then.

What always perks me up is when I see a really attractive girl with a pig ugly guy, I work in Tesco so I see it quite alot. But it makes me remember that it's not impossible to get anyone, just follow some simple steps and you can be in there.

[Greetings]

nah seriously i dont know what it is, i know im not a looker and should probably have lower standards for a relationship, and mates have told me this"why did you get rid of her she was mint, you wont be able to do better etc" but then i think if i dont want to be with them why should i be, and i cant drop my standards for happiness. which is what relationships should all be about.

that pretty much sums it up for me.

i understand you being slightly put off by a girl who smokes and doesn't get on with female friends, but what's up with the other one suddenly becoming unattractive? if you did find her attractive, it's probably just a (temporary?) state of mind. i wasn't too fond of my ex's appearance when i first met her, fell in love with her character and then one day i woke up and found her beautiful. my mates thought she was stunning but she wasn't my cup of tea at all. kind of weird but i just changed in a matter of a day or two.

personally, i'd probably have lower standards if not for that relationship. on one hand it pisses me off that i knew such a lovely girl because now my standards are ridiculously high, on the other hand it was a great time being with her. since then i've literally forced myself into finding some girls attractive - just for the sake of having a different girlfriend and seeing how it's like - but it's no use. think of it as getting used to an mgf or crx and then having to drive around in a 126p (google it). no matter how hard you try, you'll never like it.

meh, took me over half an hour to write this, i'm hopeless.

edit

lol, this wasn't here when i started replying

but from what I've heard from girls, they love confidence. If you don't feel comfortable with yourself, or shy away then apparently thats the worst thing. Although I've also heard that they go crazy for you if give them the silent treatment for abit. So confidence and silent treatment every now and then.

True, especially the silent treatment - it drives them nuts. This is all great but i think the problem he's got (and me as well) is not that girls find him unattractive, but the other way round. So it's not a question of manipulating the girl but one's own mind.

Edited May 4, 2007 by Inur

[Fishy]

To be fair to Kev though, if I was a slightly drunk bird in a club and I saw him, I wouldn't think he was unattractive at all.

Don't know if that sounds right or not. But it makes sense in my head.

Inur, post a picture up of yourself and we can all tell you if your attractive or not.

[Has anyone seen my shoe?]

Oh he's goooooooorrrrgeous

Edited May 5, 2007 by Has anyone seen my shoe?

[Greetings]

Ohh Mantalope, not as gorgeous as you

Nah seriously, I'd have some problems with aiming a camera at myself, it's kinda wrong.

edit: sorry, couldn't help it

Edited May 5, 2007 by Inur

[Bucky]

kinda pulled a fat bird last night ans she ended up staying at mine, only added her to msn last week and met he for first time last saturday but now i dont wanna see her again or go any further with her at all. dont know how to tell her to basically f**k off without pissing her off and getting all her mates giving me shit and the usual crap involved with dumping someone(even though there is no 'us' or anything)

[Haz]

Stab her.

None of her mates will go near you.

[Fishy]

In the face.

[Caleb]

kinda pulled a fat bird last night ans she ended up staying at mine, only added her to msn last week and met he for first time last saturday but now i dont wanna see her again or go any further with her at all. dont know how to tell her to basically f**k off without pissing her off and getting all her mates giving me shit and the usual crap involved with dumping someone(even though there is no 'us' or anything)

easiest way would be to get into someone else in front of her imo

just get drunk go to a club etc where she would nnormally be and use some yorkshire charm on the local talent

[Si-man]

I think the trouble is most people meet girls in bars and pubs.

and that is why im single

I dont like pub/ club atmospheres one bit and i get in kill mode when people give me funny looks so i stay away from them.

ahwell, ill find one one day

[Caleb]

not all pubs and clubs are as you'd expect though, me and josh etc go to the same two bars every weekend without fail and never get any trouble etc.

you should go scrooges si pretty sure ive seen some of your mates in there before, proper small little bar with cheap drinks and friendly atmosphere etc

[Bucky]

Stab her.

None of her mates will go near you.

In the face.

logical but i doubt itd be appropriate in this situation.

[poopipe]

logical but i doubt itd be appropriate in this situation.

throw some cake under a bus?

edit:

in full view of her obviously

Edited May 14, 2007 by poopipe

[Alan]

throw some cake under a bus?

edit:

in full view of her obviously

Funnyest thing ive read in the last 24 hours, The way you had to edit it to make sure he knew what you meant and not just for the shear hell of throwing cake under a bus hahaha :lol:

[ben_travis]

HELLPPP!!

I think I'm about lose the girl I want. Last nights party was a sign to me that she doesn't like my physically or mentally anymore.

ANY IDEAS ?! - Flowers - Chocolates. I have £40... ANYTHING!

I can't bare to loose her!

your 16, chill out. plenty more fish in the sea. take a leaf of daveys book, he swaps lasses like no-one could