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Teenage Angst Communal Agony Aunt Thread


Has anyone seen my shoe?

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Me and the missus went to Thailand, we spent the first 3 weeks on a tour operated by a UK friend then 3 weeks doing our own thing which was brilliant - book whatever mode of transport is available to wherever we fancied on the day (be it 15 mins or 15 hours away) sort out somewhere to stay when we got there and just enjoyed. It is really, really easy to get around and find a place to stay.

Can't quite get my head around what is not appealing about winging it compared to some kind of package/schedule/staying largely in the same place? You get to experience a culture doing it that way rather than just stay in resorts full of fat Western men with no respect and not enough clothes.

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She's got NOTHING booked though Rich, like...no hostels, not a single hotel. Absolutely nothing.

And? I spent months travelling around Europe (yeah I know, probably more easy than the Far East) and I didn't book anywhere to stay, and yet every night for months I had somewhere to stay. It's really not that difficult.

Remember when you're not working and travelling, weeks even days feel like vast amounts of time, so spending a few minutes to find a bed for the night isn't a big ask.

You ask why anyone would want to travel? I ask, why would anyone want to see the same thing time and time again with no change? To quote a middle-aged balding Aussie singer: "people always talk about being afraid of change, for me I'm more afraid of things staying the same".

*no current GF issues*

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The thing is, if it was a trip to Thailand 20-30 years ago I could understand a little apprehensiveness about it, but access to the internet is a massive safety net. If you wanted to, you could just get your phone out, go online and book a room in a hostel for that night. From the sounds of things though it's not particularly difficult to do that 'offline' so if the main issue is about having somewhere to stay, that needn't be one. Once that concern is taken care of there's not really much else to do apart from enjoying the time out there.

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(She's not even in Thailand yet, she's currently in Melaka in Malaysia)

It'll be what it will be.

She has managed to get about 200 pictures up on Dropbox, and the places she is going look fantastic.

Apparently she's having quite a few problems because lots of places won't let you in if you don't have your knees covered? So she's having to buy huge body drapes.

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You seem to be making issues out of nothing.

She's having to buy body drapes, for what I assume will be about 5p in our money.

And honestly, it seems to me like it's totally out of your comfort zone so you're wondering why she's not scared about what's happening - could be wrong, but that's how your posts read.

Some people like to plan to the last detail, others like to think "f**k it, I'll just go and see what happens". I'm somewhere in the middle, I plan it a little but then do whatever once I'm there.

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If you plan it all out you end up clutching a Lonely Planet, ticking stuff off and having a cookie cutter replica of everyone else's holiday.

Malaysia likes women to cover up a lot of the time because they are a Muslim country. However you can still drink, and actually in Malaysia women are respected and treated very kindly. A lot of the trains have a female only carriage.

Even in Thailand at Buddhist sites women (and men) need clothing below the knee. It's just a cultural difference, and it's interesting in itself. A lot of us actually like these new experiences, like when I went to Bangladesh and ate food with my hands. Shock horror. Nothing like stepping out of the western comfort bubble once in a while.

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She's got NOTHING booked though Rich, like...no hostels, not a single hotel. Absolutely nothing.

Aside from the tour, which was kind of a comfort thing, the last 3 weeks we hadn't booked a single thing and only had a very rough idea where we wanted to go, it was great, easy, did loads of stuff and had a mint time!

Next time we go anywhere it won't involve a tour!

Also covering knees and shoulders is the norm and most places it matters in supply dressing gown type things, or a wrap thing will cost you about a quid.

Chill out, accept that not everyone likes the same things you do (apply this to car thread too ;))

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I'm not making issues out of annnnnything, especially not in her eyes.

In her eyes I'm over the moon that she's going travelling and just want her to have an amazing time.

But everybody who knows me knows I would like nothing more than for her to come home. Which whilst selfish is an understandable feeling.

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"So you want to go and f**k people is what you're basically saying?"

"No, not at all."

"Well it sounds like that."

Well it doesn't, because I'm not interested in f**king other people. And this is why I'm not taking you."

"Because I'll get in the way of you taking it up the shitter from a some stranger on a beach in Australia?"

"Yes that's exactly why. Twat."

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Shoe on the other foot.

Actually, that doesn't work with you does it Dan.

Everybody here put themselves in a position where their partner says they're going travelling (at the time of discussing it was for a full year) and you can't come. And you ask them why, and they say it's because they want to meet new people.

Bazinga.

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Shoe on the other foot.

Actually, that doesn't work with you does it Dan.

Everybody here put themselves in a position where their partner says they're going travelling (at the time of discussing it was for a full year) and you can't come. And you ask them why, and they say it's because they want to meet new people.

Bazinga.

I do have odd sized feet unfortunately.

But seriously, you need to chill out.

I'm only quoting you because you've said one thing then contradicted yourself, absolutely nothing to do with me and my beliefs.

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Shoe on the other foot.

Everybody here put themselves in a position where their partner says they're going travelling (at the time of discussing it was for a full year) and you can't come. And you ask them why, and they say it's because they want to meet new people.

On a more serious note - why would you be worried about that? The idea of being in a relationship is that you are still your own person, just the other half makes it better for you. If they wanna sod off and do something 'selfish' for a bit, then fair play I say.

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I don't get backpacking/travelling either, or holidays in general. You travel hundreds/thousands of miles to a foreign place to sit on a beach, party, touch sedated tigers, look at some mountains, walk through some trees, f**k some foreign dudes/girls. Then you go home and back to your daily job. Holidays/backpacking/travelling in general doesn't appeal to me. I haven't been anywhere for about 5 years? Don't plan on anytime soon either.

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Tony, where are you living Thailand? Is it okay to say I'm jealous considering I'm still at work at 6.30pm and still have more work to do?

Don't be jealous - it's half past midnight here and I'm working ; 0

I'm in Bangkok, in the city. I think it's easy for threads like this to get confusing - I'm not living the backpacker lifestyle, I just live in Asia, and I was trying to give Jardo examples of why other countries might have great things to offer. Actually at this point in my life I'm working lots, but then every year I try to have a couple of months off to go on some adventures.

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