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Teenage Angst Communal Agony Aunt Thread


Has anyone seen my shoe?

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Whatever you do, DO NOT text when you're drunk later. As already said, you WILL say some desperate bullshit that will not get you anywhere.

Give her space, she might realise what she's done. Sheryl and I broke up for a week about 3 months into the relationship, she got scared basically, hadn't been in a "proper" relationship before. A week later she contacted me and said she'd made a big mistake...

3 years later we're still together and we moved over to Bristol from Hastings, both happy :)

So, basically, don't do desperate shite - let her come back if she wants to.

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Whatever you do, DO NOT text when you're drunk later. As already said, you WILL say some desperate bullshit that will not get you anywhere.

As an expert and professional drunk caller/texter ( I have called people while having sex and just talked to them like 5 minutes, my ex over Europe many many many times, friends...) DO NOT do that, NEVER NEVER NO NO NO!!!!

I hope my message get through like

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ok i need a bit off advice

i split up with my girlfreind and when i did she told me she was pregnant and she is confirmed by the dr

the thing is ive had the snip years ago so i dont now what to think any advice guys

The nip isn't 100% - go flower in a cup and see if you got any pollen left

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Cannot believe I am posting in here haha.

Oh how times change!

5 years ago, I had something steady going with somebody f**king awesome. Really really good friend with benefits, used to work with her at the pub, good friends with her parents and my dad is a good family friend.

She was very uncommitted and wasn't looking for anything more than casual sex with a good friend. She is quite a bit older than me, and there is quite a big "class" boundary between us, I like to think of myself as kind of a big deal but compared to her I'm a tramp haha. So in short, I never stepped up to the plate and TOLD her how I felt. But she knew, and we both knew she knew.

I got fed up chasing her, and getting nothing serious back in return. But I didn't want to rock the boat with what we had. She was always leading me on, and confusing me with the way she acted and generally picking me up and putting me down. Because quite frankly I was just too needy, too young and far too annoying for anyhting serious to happen.

She never used to show any emotion about anything and was basically using me as a booty call. Now that sounds great, but at the time it kind of hurt a lot.

So I did the sensible thing, and met somebody else who did want what I wanted and moved 200 miles away to Plymouth and ignored her for years.

She was always there in the back of my mind, and when anything went wrong she was the first person my mind went to.

Whilst I was away for so long she went off and finished university placement and became a fully qualified teacher. Whilst also going off the rails and making all her mistakes.

She text me about three years into moving to Plymouth basically asking to hook up, and I lashed out and told her to f**k off. But at that point something clicked and I kept being drawn back to thinking about her.

Things went sour and I moved home.

I met something new and started to progress with her, she was lovely. Really nice and just couldn't do enough for me. But she wasn't right.

Then, out of the blue I get a phone call on new years night from my dad, he is down the pub and she is there. And she wanted to know why I didn't tell her I had moved home and when could I see her.

Same thing happens, brain ticks and I fall out of love with the person I am with and before you know it I am on the verge of doing the dirty and am talking to her more than makes me feel faithful and comfortable.

Call off the great relationship I have, and started chasing her again. Because I wanted something bad again, because she used to treat me like shit and she is a f**king immense in bed and really forceful. The sort of no holds barred sex that you just don't get in a relationship.

So, get back in touch with her and basically for the last few weeks things have been going well. Lots of sex, lots of old feelings coming back and things are good. Things have changed now, and I am much more confident with her, far less needy and much more of a man. Which obviously I wasn't 5 years ago.

However, just because of the way I am I constantly bend over backwards for her. She says jump and I ask how high.

This week things have stepped up and she is on half term and has some free time, so totally free flowing I have stayed round at hers on Tuesday night, and Wednsday and then stayed with her on Thursday morning. Then went and stayed round last night.

Last night things got weird, really weird. I f**ked the shit out of her after a really nice night at home with a take away, and we were laying in bed and she said some things I have never expected.

I don't know how to take these things, so I guess now I have explained my background with this one the scenario I want to give TF is this...

We are laying in bed and she appologises, I asked what for and she said "I was such a bitch to you before."

Fair enough she feels bad for not being straight with me years ago.

I tell her it's fine, I appreciate I was a very needy boy, and that I understand why she felt the way she did.

We then joked about her being an emotional stone and that she had f**ked with my head and made me a cynical shadow of my former self.

She said "I just can't do it though, obviously works because I haven't had my heart broken yet."

So I went in for the sympathy kill and said "I did, once." Then gave her puppy eyes.

Boom, back to being the ice queen.

Then about ten minutes later she was really cuddly and when I went to sleep she was fully wrapped around me and being VERY unlike her.

So, do I try and play it cool and just lay low and keep going as we are. I'm just a bit concerned she is playing her old mind games, or that I could f**k her off and ruin what we currently have.

The signs are there, but I am confused.

Very unlike me.

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If you would rephrase it, I guess it could go as an article in Playboy

Wow, thats interesting, I have not heard anything like that, but I guess it is because of my young age

I am going to write of the story of my ex as well, if that would not be a problem for you

Great, she celebrates her birthday, and I never told the full story to anyone, hopefully it will help me, like for yous guys :)

Back in Hungary, 4 years ago. I was in College, I just got taste of the LIFE, girls parties, more parties, drinking, friends, I reckon the thing that a healthy teenager should have to try to be unhealthy while he can recover. It was plain awesome, but girl next class was simply beautiful, she was half a year younger than me. For like a year I was trying to be with her with no success, but after I told them that I move, she burst out and told me she loves me

Note: It is still unclear until today, whether it was true love from her, or just getting attention, how my sisters told me.

Before I moved out, we got together like a couple. After I moved out, and got proper internet and cheap phone to talk to her, we were talking 24/7. I guess I talked to her more, than with my dad. It was romantic for the first time, but after a while, it was demolishing me from the inside, but our love just kept me alive.

Meanwhile, I moved here, and I started to forget how to live a social life. I started to play World of Warcraft( do not play that game. never), and starting trials. I was and I am really bad, but I loved it, and it took my attention away from the lack of social life. After half a year, I went back for a holiday. I was with her all the time, and I reckon my most beautiful days was spend with her there, and later on as well. It was just plain beautiful. After I came back, I got power again, I felt the love, and it was great, just started college here, friends, fun parties, new people, lovely. She was over in October, and again, I guess I have never been that happy in my life.

But there is one thing about me. I am very rational. That is the reason why I can make good decision or why I am very good at computers. I live by logic and she live the life in an artistic, beautiful way. For example she loves Disney, as she thinks its beautiful, personally I hate this over cute style, and the stories. Because of that and because I loved her so much I wanted to move together somehow, "make the next step". But because we did not really spent that much time together, I was not brave enough to do it. And what was logical to do after I saw that it cannot work out in a long term? I broke up with her. It was not easy, but I believed I did the right thing. No. I did not. I broke up with her in December, in February she got together with one of my best mates. Although it is cool to me, I am the person who says that no girls can break a bromance. It was really awkward to met her this summer, as if its possible, she became more beautiful than ever. My social skills were improving until we broke up, since then, I just lost it completely, and still misses her really really. I know, it is time to move on, for a long time, but I just need to gain some social skills back, and thats really difficult. like being a teenager again, after playing with CoD for 470 hours....

This is my story and basically that is the reason why I am here. Trials keep the life in me, and sometimes I just spent shitloads of money on my bike, and I am not a good or okay rider, but it keeps me alive, and out in the world. And I have not met you, as it is a great community, even with you, Brad as well :wub:

Edited by UKHippY
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Also she said that she kind of wants it both ways, like she wants me to kiss and cuddle in bed but also wants to go out "on the lash" and not have to worry about what she does.

This doesn't work. Ever. You'll always have the thought in your head about her and some other guy, and it f**king hurts that you have to think about someone you love like that. I find it unusual a that a bird would do that, but meh, that's how it is. Giz a bell if you wanna chat :)

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Right. Update.

Last night Grace called and I didn't answer and text me loads asking me to talk to her which I ignored until this morning after the night out as she said she felt like shed made a terrible mistake etc so I replied.

Had a phone call just now and I decided that I would go on a week break as she wants to be forced to realise how much she takes me for granted. We've both agreed that we are still together and it's not a break where we can sleep or kiss around. Both absolutely perfect with that.

See what happens in this week I suppose. I still feel like shit about it all especially with how much we have together. And I have always been against breaks as I think if you're having problems now then surely they're not going to improve?

Can anyone prove me wrong where it's actually helped?

It's weird cos it's not a break as in like do we still like each other it's different :(

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That's exact how I felt about it too.

But surely not as well though as I didn'ttalk to her all day yesterday and she messaged me saying she missed me already this morning.

Like I said though, it's not a break because we've been arguing at all because we haven't. More of If she actually misses me I guess :(

Absolutely bullshit either way.

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I'm late in.... but duuude! That sucks. I'm sorry to sound like an arse but your description of the 'talk' makes it sound like she said your cramping her style!? And what guy goes home with a girl expecting to get an actual coffee? (Or a chat in this case)

You also said she's not like that any more... I can't help thinking she wanted a nice guy like you but got to remenising about her previous existance recently and is more drawn to that than you.

I hope I'm just a synic and the world is a nice place full of genuinly nice women but in my experiance, it isn't :(

Breaks rarely end in togetherness either

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Hmm maybe. It wasn't like that and I do believe her. I know when she's lying. He did offer to meet up at the train station but she didn't want to get cold as she had been at home for a bit.

She was saying that she doesn't want to get with other people but she kind of wants the say in it, like she wants the control whether she can. I don't really get it but that's what she said. Think she just wants independence of being at uni away from family etc.

f**k it. Plenty more fish in the sea anyway. Got someone's number last night anyway as she wanted to stay in touch so I can't be the worst person in the world lol. Didn't fancy her at all though, really dislike blondes haha. Trying to stay positive.

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Yehhhhhh f**k that Dan. I had discussions like that with my previous girlfriend who said shit like "I just want the control back", really they want the excitement that comes with meeting new people IMO, Not meaning sex necessarily but the thrill of flirting and first dates and stuff.

If she's still saying that sort of thing whilst also saying she misses you and wants you back, she doesn't miss you enough and a month down the line you'll be all upset wondering what she's up to when you're not with her.

I'm with JD. No-one suggests a break if they truly want to hold on to someone. They talk and work it out.

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Why does she need a week "off" to see if she misses you? If she doesn't know if she will miss you or not, she doesn't want to be with you.

As much as it sucks dude, I agree with the others saying it's time to move on. It's hard to let go...but sometimes it's better to be the bigger person and cut it off before you get hurt anymore.

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