Greetings Posted January 4, 2013 Report Share Posted January 4, 2013 Got a problem but with myself. I've recently understood that the relationship I'm in could last for a very long time. I'm very happy but I can't help thinking that this has happened too soon, I still want to poke some other females before I settle down Been trying to convince the gf to have a threesome and she's kind of agreed but to be honest I can't see it happening. Solutions? Breaking up with her is the last thing I want to do, as is cheating. Could it be a case of wanting to do something only because it's "forbidden"? Anyone else on here experienced the same temptations? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duncy H Posted January 4, 2013 Report Share Posted January 4, 2013 It's human nature to want what you haven't got. Like in your case I believe it's something you want cause you don't have it, where as i think if you weren't with said girl and were poking around in a few fanooters you may wish to be settled down with someone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trialsmax04 Posted January 4, 2013 Report Share Posted January 4, 2013 Got a problem but with myself. I've recently understood that the relationship I'm in could last for a very long time. I'm very happy but I can't help thinking that this has happened too soon, I still want to poke some other females before I settle down Been trying to convince the gf to have a threesome and she's kind of agreed but to be honest I can't see it happening. Solutions? Breaking up with her is the last thing I want to do, as is cheating. Could it be a case of wanting to do something only because it's "forbidden"? Anyone else on here experienced the same temptations? I felt like this with said ex in my previous post. Now I have done the whole poking around/ uni life thing, I personally dont think its all what its cracked up to be. You miss the security once its gone. All personal opinion though. Being single for a while has made me meet so many more new people its unreal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greetings Posted January 4, 2013 Report Share Posted January 4, 2013 Yeah, that seems bang on. When I was single I longed for a relationship. Now that the feeling of security has sunk in, I long for some of the benefits of being single. Still feel stuck, god knows how long it'll be before I poke someone else This attitude probably makes me sound really primitive, but let's be frank - we're men and we have urges. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dann2707 Posted January 4, 2013 Report Share Posted January 4, 2013 Sounds to me like this girl isn't giving you what you want but you've dropped yourself into a sense where you are too involved to get out sort of thing? I remember a post by you ages ago about how you had to think about someone else? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max Quinn Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 (edited) Surely if you're feeling that bad about it, she's not the one and you need to get out?Obviously it's only something you can answer, but it seems to me you just need to not let some fear of being alone or whatever get the best of you and do whatever feels right. If you wanna shag about now, what about in ten years when she's severely aged and you find you have little to talk about other than the school run? Edited January 5, 2013 by Max Quinn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Harrison Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 Yeah nothing worse than staying in a relationship because you're scared of being alone or that you won't find a better one. This is why so many people 'settle' and end up discontented further down the line. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muel Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 Sounds like you're not ready to settle down, or that there are other problems in your relationship. Personally, I just ignore those kind of urges. Every bloke gets them, especially when we're young, but I'm certain I'd rather be in my relationship because I think it's going somewhere. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greetings Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 Sounds like you're not ready to settle down, or that there are other problems in your relationship. Personally, I just ignore those kind of urges. Every bloke gets them, especially when we're young, but I'm certain I'd rather be in my relationship because I think it's going somewhere. I think this most accurately describes how I'm feeling now. Just not ready. Perhaps she's not exactly my type in terms of looks. I think she's attractive, but it's pretty difficult to judge the looks of your own gf. To the above posters, I don't see this relationship as something I've settled for. I'd happily spend the rest of my life with this girl. Perhaps, because I've realised recently that this might happen, I'm starting to panic a bit? Getting to grip with what I'm sacrificing maybe... I don't know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Little Yoshi Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 Post a pic and we can tell you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MadManMike Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 +1 on pics. We need to see before we can make an informed judgement. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muel Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 Yep, pics, naked pics. Definitely. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Harrison Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 I think she's attractive, but it's pretty difficult to judge the looks of your own gf. Is it? I have never had this issue. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greetings Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 Is it? I have never had this issue. Clouded judgement, I've found that after falling for a girl I'd find her a lot more attractive than before. Surely not alone on this one? Post a pic and we can tell you. There are weirder places than TF to do so, so in the interest of science... meh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muel Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 (edited) I think you might be gay. EDIT: You changed the picture, but I stand by my theory. Edited January 5, 2013 by Muel Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Harrison Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 Clouded judgement, I've found that after falling for a girl I'd find her a lot more attractive than before. Surely not alone on this one? Usually I notice a girl who is attractive, and yes, you might find you warm to her even more as things progress (not least when she undresses). However, I would judge looks of a gf in the same way I would judge the looks of any other girl. That she's my girlfriend wouldn't make much difference. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MadManMike Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 Clouded judgement, I've found that after falling for a girl I'd find her a lot more attractive than before. Surely not alone on this one? There are weirder places than TF to do so, so in the interest of science... meh. Dude you're thinking of tapping others when you have her long term? As Jay-Z would say: "That shit cray" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max Quinn Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 (edited) *Awaits barrage of hormonal little scrots who can't watch porn cos mummy's next door*Seriously though man, she fine. And looks naughty.Usually I notice a girl who is attractive, and yes, you might find you warm to her even more as things progress (not least when she undresses). However, I would judge looks of a gf in the same way I would judge the looks of any other girl. That she's my girlfriend wouldn't make much difference.Think I actually know what he means a bit although it sound odd. There's been a few girls I've fallen for and then when it's not worked out or whatever looked back and thought (honestly not as a result of being pissed off, talking a little while after or whatever)'she's not even that fit, what did I see'? You were obviously attracted to them, but if you had to judge them on some conventional fit scale they wouldn't do as well as you'd have thought originally when you were clouded by other stuff. Hard to explain. Edited January 5, 2013 by Max Quinn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greetings Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 *Awaits barrage of hormonal little scrots who can't watch porn cos mummy's next door* That's Trials Chat, I think we're fine in here With regard to the edit, I feel the same. Certainly don't find my ex gf's as attractive as when we were in a relationship. I think you might be gay. It's funny weird how often that comes up in here. Nah, I didn't say she's ugly, just perhaps not my type. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JD™ Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 I often get it the other way round, find someone super attractive and then get into a relationship and start mentally picking holes in them.. I thought that was the norm to be honest! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dann2707 Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 It is isn't it JD? But I reckon you learn to love their little traits. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duncy H Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 I'll pm you my address so you can send her here when you are done Being serious though, I can understand where you are coming from when you have these realizations of big commitments/obvious turns to take control of your future. Best thing is probably to keep on going as you are, i.e. questioning it but don't let it get to you too much and don't rush anything. I do still think it could be a case of "the grass is greener on the other side" but of coarse it is catch 22 with knowing what you really want. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skoze Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 I think it's pretty normal. I know i've done it, it's just the inner caveman as you said kinda shitting himself about the prospect of not shagging anyone else potentially ever, but is it really gonna be worth dropping her just to stick it in someone else? We've all thought it, you've just gotta really weigh it up... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max Quinn Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 (edited) I often get it the other way round, find someone super attractive and then get into a relationship and start mentally picking holes in them.. I thought that was the norm to be honest!I guess that's kind of what I mean, there was obviously a point where you were blinded by the attraction and didn't notice those holes? It's that period of time that I'm getting at. That's not to say you have no idea whatsoever though haha. Edited January 5, 2013 by Max Quinn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
N.Wood Posted January 5, 2013 Report Share Posted January 5, 2013 I'd agree with not knowing how hot your gf is... I think judgement gets clouded. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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