dann2707 Posted August 19, 2012 Report Share Posted August 19, 2012 This is exactly what this thread needs. That's amazing. Tell him asap, record the convo and post it up heya. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bikeperson45 Posted August 20, 2012 Report Share Posted August 20, 2012 Get some new ones without telling him and keep the others as a trophy? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
george_seamons Posted August 20, 2012 Report Share Posted August 20, 2012 He knows, he just doesn't want to admit it. Was she really hairy like all Germans?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Token Posted August 20, 2012 Report Share Posted August 20, 2012 Get some new ones without telling him and keep the others as a trophy? Are you a serial killer? He knows, he just doesn't want to admit it. Was she really hairy like all Germans?! She was totally shaven, apart from her head and eyebrows. I was hoping for atleast a little under arm fluff to spice things up. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duncy H Posted August 20, 2012 Report Share Posted August 20, 2012 (edited) Edit: WomAn stuff Edited August 20, 2012 by Duncy H Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bikeperson45 Posted August 20, 2012 Report Share Posted August 20, 2012 Are you a serial killer? I've seen a few documentaries is all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simpson Posted August 20, 2012 Report Share Posted August 20, 2012 Depends on if your mate has crack doesn't it? The other night I was round my best mates when his housemate (who im also good friends with) comes back with this mountain of a women, shes unattractive, sweaty generally grim, but were quite licked by this point. She tryed talking to us but left when she realised we wern't going to talk to her and were more interested to make a cereal bowl of sugary sweets. Later in the night I get up and walk upstairs to the loo, the "thing" is coming out the bathroom, butt naked, red rash over half of her body, tits or rolls of fat everywhere and stumbles back into my mates room. I ignore it and go for a piss to find a blood filled sanitary towel unflushed in the toilet and blood everywhere the place looked like a crime scene. Horrible. Told him in the morning and he was just so casual about it, " I aint had sex in 6 months needed to break the curse". Some may call these antics "lads" however I refer to them as HIV positive. Haha 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaun H Posted August 20, 2012 Report Share Posted August 20, 2012 ...aaaaaand that's enough internet for today. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Harrison Posted August 20, 2012 Report Share Posted August 20, 2012 Some may call these antics "lads" I never got that. Blokes saying "Ah mate, you gotta do a fat bird now and then! You gotta f'ck a munta!". Actually, no, I'll just stick with the pretty ones thanks... ; ) Also, I like how you refer to her as 'it'!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
george_seamons Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 That put me right off my jam on toast 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LukasMcNeal Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 Regarding menstrual blood related incidents... At V festival this weekend on the last day I went to use the portaloo in the morning very hungover and feeling very sick, if the smell nor the poo smeared over the seat wasn't enough to make me chunder the used tampon placed next to the flusher with a trail of broken uterus around it definitely did cue the chunder dragon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dann2707 Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 Thats disgusting did you have a good time? Loads of my friends went which surprised me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dann2707 Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 Here's one for debate. Do you think someone giving someone an Sti is grounds for dumping someone? (Not because they've cheated and got it from someone else) It came up in convo a few weeks back and I was shocked that my gf would. Or said she would anyway regardless of how much she liked someone To me I think that's mad, like saying you'd finish someone if they gave you flu. But in her defence she sees it like if they haven't checked then its as if they don't care about the other persons health. Am I being outrageous thinking that is a bit superficial though? What's yer thoughts? Deffo not through experience btw just wanted to know what others made of that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JD™ Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 I think if you didn't know you had one and passed it on then it's fairly unreasonable to be dumped because you then passed it on. HOWEVER, it's so easy to get checked that there's no reason not to know, so I can't really make my mind up. I know that if I got one from Hayley it'd mindf**k me more that she might be cheating than that I had some sort of infection, and that'd be the more likely reason for a breakup. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss-Higgy Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 See one of my friends dumped someone on those grounds and i have to fully agree with her, and your girlfriend. It is like having a total disregard for your partners health.. Getting yourself checked is easy enough, or you could go get checked together would be like a date and everything 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danrobinson Posted August 21, 2012 Report Share Posted August 21, 2012 go get checked together would be like a date and everything yeah, pissing in a cup side by side, with a candle burning next to youse Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JD™ Posted August 24, 2012 Report Share Posted August 24, 2012 So, I managed to pull out the whole 'calling your girlfriend the wrong name in bed' trick this morning Luckily, in this case 'in bed' means only that, but it's clearly still not good. Basically said "I was all wide awake and ready to leave for work but, no, Leanne with her snoozing puts me back to sleep and late". Clearly it's not a relationship wrecking moment, but it wasn't high on my todo list for today... Thing is, I have a likely explanation for the slip of the tongue, but do I bother trying to explain or just let it go? The explanation is this: During aforementioned snoozing, I had been thinking about a dinner party we're holding tomorrow night at mine. British theme (obviously) and one of the things Hayley wants us to do is make some masks of British athletes for people to wear during some games we've got planned. I was thinking that I've got to make them today, and that they'd be quite a nice addition to a drawer I have in my flat which I call the 'sentimental drawer'. That lead me to thinking that I should probably separate that drawer out because there's now beginning to be 3 relationships worth of stuff in there. The train of thought then went to some of the stuff I've got from me and Leanne and am I really bothered about keeping any of it - then I said her name in the sentence. Basically I can't decide whether saying that will make it any easier for Hayley or whether it would just make her think I'm trying to make excuses so it'd just be best to leave it as is with a simple 'I'm a dick, see you tonight'... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wrayvon Posted August 24, 2012 Report Share Posted August 24, 2012 The latter, I'm a dick see you tonight is probably wise otherwise she'll think you're just making excuses and look into it a bit more*. *Probably Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jolfa Posted August 24, 2012 Report Share Posted August 24, 2012 That's got to be the worlds worst/long winded excuse anyway "sorry I called you my exes name, it's because I've got a drawer full of things that remind me of ex girlfriends" Quit while you're behind, "I'm a dick" is better for everyone. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JT! Posted August 24, 2012 Report Share Posted August 24, 2012 Was she pissed off? You didn't mention once in your post how she reacted. Maybe you're making a bigger deal about it than it actually is? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JD™ Posted August 24, 2012 Report Share Posted August 24, 2012 Good points, I'll keep it canned. JT, she is pretty good at keeping these things under wraps but I can tell it pissed her off. I probably wouldn't really think twice about it if it wasn't for the fact she's having a shit time in work at the moment and my sole objective for last night and this morning was to cheer her up ready for today - I was doing really well until then! Clearly it's not the biggest problem in the world, just wanted some other opinions before I did anything to make it worse.. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eddbmxdude Posted August 24, 2012 Report Share Posted August 24, 2012 All girls are crazy. Did the horizontal monster mash with a mate of mine (Lynette) a few weeks ago on a drunken night out. We talked about it a few days later and both agreed that it was just a one off thing. Turns out she's 110% mental. A few nights later she starts texting me. Says shes at a party and that I should be there. She's obviously drunk. Tries ringing me a couple of times, but I don't answer. She is in York at uni and I live near Luton, a safe distance away. The following Saturday night, im laying in bed just about to go to sleep and my phone rings. Its her so I ignore it but she keeps ringing so eventually I answer it. She's back from uni and out in town and shes drunk, wants me to come out. I didn't have any money and wasn't feeling going in town anyway, which is why I was in bed. She starts saying that she's going to book a taxi to my house to pick me up and bring me to town. WTF? I refuse and tell her Im going to sleep but she keeps saying Im boring and that I should come out. I hang up and go to sleep. Its about half 12. I wake up to my phone ringing, I check the time, its half 3. Its my friend Jenny. She was out in town with Lynette and was supposed to be sharing a taxi home with her. She tells me she thinks shes got a taxi to mine instead of her place, and that she's probably stumbling around outside mine now. WTF?!!! I live in a chalet at the bottom of my parents garden and the last thing I wanted her to do was start ringing the doorbell and waking my parents up at half 3 in the morning, so go out the front and sure enough, there she is. Standing at the bottom of my drive, paralytic. She's so drunk she can hardly talk. I bring her inside and put her to bed and go to sleep on the sofa. She has other ideas. She gets up and tries to start climbing under the duvet with me on the sofa. I tell her to get back into bed but she's having none of it and just keeps trying to get on the sofa with me. This is ridiculous now and she's not listening to me at all. I trick her onto the sofa by saying she can get under the duvet with me and then I jump into my bed. Doesn't last long, she then gets into bed with me and jumps on top of me!! I tell her to go to sleep but she keeps trying it on. Im getting really annoyed at this point because Im supposed to be going to Barrow Farm the next day, so need some sleep. I pretty much have to shout at her to stop climbing on me and to go to sleep. Finally she just lays there quietly but not for long. She starts whispering to me. 'Edd, can I tell you something?'. Im like 'Yeah, then go to sleep!'. She replied, 'I'll tell you in the morning.' Repeat x99999999. Finally it seems like she's going to shutup and just before I go to sleep she says, 'Edd, I love you'. FML. In the morning she can't remember any of it, either that or she can remember everything and is too ashamed to admit it. She's a bit confused and embarrassed when she wakes up in my bed. It gets even better when my Dad brings me a cup of coffee thinking im in bed alone. His face was priceless! Last weekend my ex (who is now a lesbian and is engaged to a woman), who knows Lynette, found out about all the above and goes skitzo. Rings me up and has a go at me saying that I shouldn't sleep with people she knows, especially not Lenny because she's crazy (Well I know that NOW!) and is just generally going off on one. Starts crying and says she's more upset that I didn't tell her about it. WTF woman? Im not even with her anymore, so why does it matter who I sleep with? I managed to calm her down after a while and she seemed ok about it all. What I don't get is why she even cares about what I do anymore. We haven't been together for 3 years and she is engaged to this other girl and planning on having kids with her (Don't ask me how that works, I have no idea either). I don't really know what the point in typing all that out was. Take it as a warning, ALL women are mental. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
N.Wood Posted August 24, 2012 Report Share Posted August 24, 2012 Yep. Mental and whores. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simpson Posted August 24, 2012 Report Share Posted August 24, 2012 Just ignore it your making a big deal outta nothing, its natural to slip out the wrong name sometimes. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weirdoku Posted August 24, 2012 Report Share Posted August 24, 2012 tl;dr I turned down sexy time. But it's cool, don't stick your dick in crazy. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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