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Teenage Angst Communal Agony Aunt Thread


Has anyone seen my shoe?

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Should keep this updated then. Well done man.

Sorry, I was a bit preoccupied this weekend...

good good, because if im honest, i hadnt print screened jack shit, and really couldnt be assed typing a message out to her explaining the situation.

thats another result earned for an empty threat

Yeh, I guessed as much. The thought of your neanderthal brain being able to process "print screen, paste, save" seemed a bit far fetched to be honest. :P

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Let me throw a hypothetical in here. Lets say you had some bad experiences with girls in the past - say emotional trauma after one or two breakups. Do you think it's possible for the subconciousness to block any thoughts leading to the realisation that you want to be in a long term relationship with someone? As in just finding stupid flaws with every girl which stop you from further pursuing the relationship?

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Yeah it's 'scared of being hurt' and finding any excuse to end a relationship. If you're in that situation best thing to do really it take some time off and be single for as long as you feel you need to.

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Yeah it's 'scared of being hurt' and finding any excuse to end a relationship. If you're in that situation best thing to do really it take some time off and be single for as long as you feel you need to.

I disagree, but can see why you'd think that. I personally think it's best to keep trying. Liken it to stacking on the bike - if you don't try that move again you're never going to get it right. Kind of a tedious link, but if you don't TRY to see a girl is 'worth it' then you won't ever find that one is. Sure, you'll probably still fail to see past the stupid flaws for a while, but if you try you'll get there eventually!

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"scared of getting hurt" is why so many people avoid taking risks. As far as women go, I know what it can be like to not want to commit because someone doesn't make you feel like someone beforehand did, but the best thing to do is to not think about it. Meet women, see what happens. Also, I've found that the more time that passes since I broke up with 'the one', the I remember more of the bad times and less of the good. Each relationship is an experience, so just take it for that. When it's ready to work, it will.

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Reading those posts makes me think of all the issues I had with ex girlfriends then I met my wife and it was all just so easy and "right". None of the usual mind games, arguments or issues. The old cliche "you haven't met the right woman yet" is completely understandable when you do meet her (or him!).

To summarise, I think if you're with the right person it doesn't feel like trying.

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Yeah it's 'scared of being hurt'

If it's that then I'm very unaware of it. What I'm aware of is reaching a conclusion that the given girl isn't worth my time after a few dates and that I can't even be arsed to poke her. Happened hmm 10 times this year? It always works in a simlar way: first date usually ends with me thinking it's worth pursuing the matter further. 2nd leaves me thinking "meh...", 3rd usually takes place only if the girl insists and confirms my belief that this is not the person I'm after. Maybe to some of you this is a trivial or funny matter but it's starting to worry me.

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If it's that then I'm very unaware of it. What I'm aware of is reaching a conclusion that the given girl isn't worth my time after a few dates and that I can't even be arsed to poke her. Happened hmm 10 times this year? It always works in a simlar way: first date usually ends with me thinking it's worth pursuing the matter further. 2nd leaves me thinking "meh...", 3rd usually takes place only if the girl insists and confirms my belief that this is not the person I'm after. Maybe to some of you this is a trivial or funny matter but it's starting to worry me.

this may be an unconscious reflex

if you have been hurt really bad in the past, or very disapointed in another person this may be the case I guess

I know I may end up like this aswell.

there's some feelings you don't really want to feel twice

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