Teenage Angst Communal Agony Aunt Thread

[Token]

Maaaate! Girls can't say stuff like "I do quite want you, now." and then follow it up with "Im off to a fancydress party as a french maid on friday, shame you can't come".

[omgnoseat]

I've had an extremely depressing night and want to get it off my chest...

Feel free to laugh if you want, there are some stupid bits in, but i'm a really emotional guy atm

It's a long read, so I can understand if you can't be bothered to read it.

I've known this girl on msn for 2 years now, I'll just call her Jessica [not her real name]

She was the one I could talk to when I felt depressed, and she could talk to me aswell [she has major troubles at home].

I really began to like her and kinda wanted to give a try to make something out of it...but I have a bit of social phobia...and I really didn't had the guts to meet her.

So I never met her...

I had alot of conversations with her regarding my feelings towards her, she told me she felt the same but she never wanted to meet anyway because she was afraid of risking our friendship.

An old schoolfriend [Larissa] became my girlfriend later because I was quite lonely [no gf past 4 years], I did have feelings towards her, but my feelings towards Jessica were alot bigger..even though only knowing her on msn.

About 5months later Larissa and I broke up, due to me doing stupid things, we're still friends though.

Jessica has been in my mind the whole time, Larissa knew this, but she understood and bares with it, even though it really hurt her, I really feel guilty...I did learn from it though.

My feelings for jessica were growing too strong and I HAD to meet her, before she met any other boys.

She still didn't want to meet, but me and a friend of her set up a little scheme to suprise her.

So I slapped myself and ignored my social fear and went to her, had a nice day out but I was extremely shy and quiet [damn social phobia] but she told me that she had a good time and that she still liked me alot.

I talked with her on msn today about my feelings for her, I told her alot of times before, but I wanted to go into it deeper.

I told her that I would like to give it a try to start something with her.

She said that she really liked me aswell, but her trust in me was gone after going with Larissa, that hurt her alot and she is afraid that I will hurt her again if we would begin something.

She told me that she never wanted to try to get a relationship.

I really freaked out because I care about her so much and I really want to get something with her..

I've been feeling sick whole evening and almost fainted on a few occasions.

So now I really want to earn her trust in me back, I will continue to meet her and show her what I am capable of in terms of royalty and things that matter in a relationship.

Now my problem is that I am extremely shy and hardly dare to talk with her, so showing what I am capable of will be really hard

I figured that buying presents and stuff is a bit like buying her to me, or begging... so I need to find an other way

Wondered if anyone could help me with this whole situation...

My apologies if this is a bit hard to read, but my native langauge isn't english and my hands are a bit shakey atm.

Thanks for taking time to read this.

[Fishy]

I've had an extremely depressing night and want to get it off my chest...

Feel free to laugh if you want, there are some stupid bits in, but i'm a really emotional guy atm

It's a long read, so I can understand if you can't be bothered to read it.

I've known this girl on msn for 2 years now, I'll just call her Jessica [not her real name]

She was the one I could talk to when I felt depressed, and she could talk to me aswell [she has major troubles at home].

I really began to like her and kinda wanted to give a try to make something out of it...but I have a bit of social phobia...and I really didn't had the guts to meet her.

So I never met her...

I had alot of conversations with her regarding my feelings towards her, she told me she felt the same but she never wanted to meet anyway because she was afraid of risking our friendship.

An old schoolfriend [Larissa] became my girlfriend later because I was quite lonely [no gf past 4 years], I did have feelings towards her, but my feelings towards Jessica were alot bigger..even though only knowing her on msn.

About 5months later Larissa and I broke up, due to me doing stupid things, we're still friends though.

Jessica has been in my mind the whole time, Larissa knew this, but she understood and bares with it, even though it really hurt her, I really feel guilty...I did learn from it though.

My feelings for jessica were growing too strong and I HAD to meet her, before she met any other boys.

She still didn't want to meet, but me and a friend of her set up a little scheme to suprise her.

So I slapped myself and ignored my social fear and went to her, had a nice day out but I was extremely shy and quiet [damn social phobia] but she told me that she had a good time and that she still liked me alot.

I talked with her on msn today about my feelings for her, I told her alot of times before, but I wanted to go into it deeper.

I told her that I would like to give it a try to start something with her.

She said that she really liked me aswell, but her trust in me was gone after going with Larissa, that hurt her alot and she is afraid that I will hurt her again if we would begin something.

She told me that she never wanted to try to get a relationship.

I really freaked out because I care about her so much and I really want to get something with her..

I've been feeling sick whole evening and almost fainted on a few occasions.

So now I really want to earn her trust in me back, I will continue to meet her and show her what I am capable of in terms of royalty and things that matter in a relationship.

Now my problem is that I am extremely shy and hardly dare to talk with her, so showing what I am capable of will be really hard

I figured that buying presents and stuff is a bit like buying her to me, or begging... so I need to find an other way

Wondered if anyone could help me with this whole situation...

My apologies if this is a bit hard to read, but my native langauge isn't english and my hands are a bit shakey atm.

Thanks for taking time to read this.

Hmmm, I would suggest just meeting up and getting comfortable around her. Being more talkative with her could suggest you both have more trust in each other and that you are overcoming your phobia for her?

[omgnoseat]

Hmmm, I would suggest just meeting up and getting comfortable around her. Being more talkative with her could suggest you both have more trust in each other and that you are overcoming your phobia for her?

I was planning to meet up with her more yeah, but she lives 2 hours traveling from me, So I can't see her alot

She is having 2 party's aswell...so afraid that she will meet other guys

She already told me that her trust in me will not return, so I will have to come with something big I guess..

Thanks alot for the reply

[Fishy]

Take her away somewhere?

Although, is she worth the hassle if she's never going to trust you? To be fair she sounds like a bint for saying that.

[omgnoseat]

Take her away somewhere?

Although, is she worth the hassle if she's never going to trust you? To be fair she sounds like a bint for saying that.

No I can totally understand her, I told her that I cared about her alot and then I just went with an other girl (Larissa), seems quite logical that I hurt her and damaged her trust in me..

Had a really crappy night, coudn't get her out my head

When I looked at the clock it was 06:15, and had to get out of bed 7 o clock =/

[James-M]

The thing is though, she didn't want to meet you incase it would damage your friendship, so why if she only wanted to be friends does she feel like she can't trust you after going out with someone? According to Jessica, nothing was to become of you two (other than friends) so I feel it was selfish for her to say that when you had a girlfriend. I mean, did she not want you to have a girlfriend just because you were her friend (nothing more) and talked on msn?

[omgnoseat]

The thing is though, she didn't want to meet you incase it would damage your friendship, so why if she only wanted to be friends does she feel like she can't trust you after going out with someone? According to Jessica, nothing was to become of you two (other than friends) so I feel it was selfish for her to say that when you had a girlfriend. I mean, did she not want you to have a girlfriend just because you were her friend (nothing more) and talked on msn?

She wanted to be more than a friend at the time that I had a girlfriend, but she was afrad to meet me.

It's a difficult situation but I can't be bothered to explain it now

Just had another talk with her and I can't handle the fact that she doesn't want to egt anything with me.

I get panic attacks and lose all control, never have felt this bad.

[Clownbike]

She wanted to be more than a friend at the time that I had a girlfriend, but she was afrad to meet me.

It's a difficult situation but I can't be bothered to explain it now

Just had another talk with her and I can't handle the fact that she doesn't want to egt anything with me.

I get panic attacks and lose all control, never have felt this bad.

I never really reply on this thread .....but hey i thought i'd give it a go. I'm usually the one my friends come to with problems of their own, i guess talking face to face is easier than this.

Anyways, i read your situation and it really touched me. I like you am a very emotional kind of guy even though i don't show it so much.

But back to your problem......i've been in a similar situation to this. I know "Jessica" said she will never trust you again, but keep trying anyway. Keep up the compliments, opening doors, making her laugh etc etc, you have to show her how fun you are to be around. Obviosuly this is difficult as you are quite a shy guy, but try to overcome that mental block. You have to get into a "social" frame of mind before you meet her. Think of questions to ask her, jokes to slip in to specific conversations, ways of showing commitment (you can use trials as an example ). I know this doesn't really help but i can't stress enough if you think she is worth it you have to make her see that your are trying (and this means being outgoing).

Another way to look at it is, she is not giving you another chance and if she liked you so much she should really give you another chance. Just a "trial" period (no pun intended), to see what a great (or crappy) guy you are. So you went out with another girl, it's not like you and "Jessica" were going out. You can tell "Jessica"the reason you went out with the other girl was to fill the emptiness inside that she left you with.

One last perspective, she told you things will never happen between you, so f*ck it.....she is the one missing out. You go and be you, do the things you want to do. At the party (if you go) it will REALLY hurt to see her with some other guy, but thats when you know you are better off with out her. She knows it will hurt you and if she does it - F*uck the bi@tch! She is outta there like ice cubes in a fanny.

Ok one more.....promise last one....get her really drunk......you know the rest or you can stick to her like glue all night and not give her a chance to go with another guy.......

Sorry i can't be of more help, i don't really know you and stuff, but i hope i helped (even in a small way).

Good luck

Neil XxX

[omgnoseat]

I never really reply on this thread .....but hey i thought i'd give it a go. I'm usually the one my friends come to with problems of their own, i guess talking face to face is easier than this.

Anyways, i read your situation and it really touched me. I like you am a very emotional kind of guy even though i don't show it so much.

But back to your problem......i've been in a similar situation to this. I know "Jessica" said she will never trust you again, but keep trying anyway. Keep up the compliments, opening doors, making her laugh etc etc, you have to show her how fun you are to be around. Obviosuly this is difficult as you are quite a shy guy, but try to overcome that mental block. You have to get into a "social" frame of mind before you meet her. Think of questions to ask her, jokes to slip in to specific conversations, ways of showing commitment (you can use trials as an example ). I know this doesn't really help but i can't stress enough if you think she is worth it you have to make her see that your are trying (and this means being outgoing).

Another way to look at it is, she is not giving you another chance and if she liked you so much she should really give you another chance. Just a "trial" period (no pun intended), to see what a great (or crappy) guy you are. So you went out with another girl, it's not like you and "Jessica" were going out. You can tell "Jessica"the reason you went out with the other girl was to fill the emptiness inside that she left you with.

One last perspective, she told you things will never happen between you, so f*ck it.....she is the one missing out. You go and be you, do the things you want to do. At the party (if you go) it will REALLY hurt to see her with some other guy, but thats when you know you are better off with out her. She knows it will hurt you and if she does it - F*uck the bi@tch! She is outta there like ice cubes in a fanny.

Ok one more.....promise last one....get her really drunk......you know the rest or you can stick to her like glue all night and not give her a chance to go with another guy.......

Sorry i can't be of more help, i don't really know you and stuff, but i hope i helped (even in a small way).

Good luck

Neil XxX

Thanks alot for the reply, it means alot to me

I'm happy that people actually care and try to help out

Anyway, I will really try to win her for me, I'm trying to get her to meet me sunday, she was reluctant at first but she knows it means alot to me.

You have to remember that she lives 2 hours away and I've only seen her once though

But I will really try to forget all the shyness and give it my best shot, I won't be able to see her alot so I have to do good this time.

Getting her drunk is no option though, I never go to party's or anything and I want her to like me for who I am, getting her drunk is cheating

[Shaun H]

Above all else:

DON'T DO A FATTYPANTIES

[omgnoseat]

Above all else:

DON'T DO A FATTYPANTIES

you mean acting like fatpants or something..?

Anyway, had another night of almost no sleep, I can't eat anymore aswell now

[JonMack]

you mean acting like fatpants or something..?

Anyway, had another night of almost no sleep, I can't eat anymore aswell now

f**k that man don't let it get you down as bad. She's only a girl.

[omgnoseat]

f**k that man don't let it get you down as bad. She's only a girl.

That is the most stupid thing to say to someone in my situation

But I will stop posting about my troubles with the girl I, it's never going to work out with her

And it won't be any use to bother people here with it anymore

[JonMack]

Well no it's not, no girl is worth not eating over. I know what it's like to fall for someone over the internet trust me I've been there, but you can't let the situation get you down this much, because you will just end up ill and feeling even worse than you do already. All you have to do is make the effort to meet up with her, I know it's hard but just do it, be yourself, and see how things progress, she's only a girl man I know she has said about having a lack of trust but you just have to earn it back, it just takes time, just dont starve yourself over it!

[munkee]

Well no it's not, no girl is worth not eating over.

first couple of weeks being back at uni with the long distance relationship with my gf caused me not to eat .. i was living off tins of tuna and bread.. was f**kin horrible but i would wake up feeling sick until i got to talk to her.. sad as f**k i know but its how some people get.. now 7 weeks in to uni im used to it and im not as bad and getting adjusted

[omgnoseat]

Well no it's not, no girl is worth not eating over. I know what it's like to fall for someone over the internet trust me I've been there, but you can't let the situation get you down this much, because you will just end up ill and feeling even worse than you do already. All you have to do is make the effort to meet up with her, I know it's hard but just do it, be yourself, and see how things progress, she's only a girl man I know she has said about having a lack of trust but you just have to earn it back, it just takes time, just dont starve yourself over it!

Uhm I don't think you fully understand, I already met her...

[JonMack]

Nah I know, I meant meet up with her more often just to prove that you're a decent guy. I know you said it's a few hours away but if she's really worth it then I know you'll do whatever you can to get her. Good luck man.

[Si-man]

Aye, she might appreciate you taking the effort to travel for hours just to see her for short time or so.

[froggy]

I've been so f**king horney today, Oh my God!!! I've just wanted to f**k everything in sight. At work I had 4 wanks on a 6 hours shift hoping I couldn't think of something else other than skull f**king the next old bint that came into the bingo hall.

I seriously don't know what got into me.. It's not as if I'm going without.

[Si-man]

lmfao

thats all i can say

[Walleee]

Edited June 11 by Walleee

[TheCircus]

At work I had 4 wanks on a 6 hours shift

WAT.

[Adam-Griffin]

I've been so f**king horney today, Oh my God!!! I've just wanted to f**k everything in sight. At work I had 4 wanks on a 6 hours shift hoping I couldn't think of something else other than skull f**king the next old bint that came into the bingo hall.

I seriously don't know what got into me.. It's not as if I'm going without.

I hope you work somewhere sexy, old peoples home for example

[Walleee]

Edited June 11 by Walleee