ScotchDave Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 (edited) Right me and a certain member of this board who shall remained un-named for his own safety :) thought it might be a good idea to have a worst jokes competition on here. I'll start us off with: what do you call a crippled NAZI? A vegetablearian. :S EDIT My un-named colleague and I have decided that this competition will close at 10:11pm, on monday the 18th. The prize will be a badge saying "I'm special, my jokes suck" and a mars bar. The winner will be announced on tuesday some time. We have also decided that any joke may be submitted, and will be judged accordingly. However we have decided that the meaning of a "bad" joke is that it makes you groan when you read it. Daver Edited April 14, 2005 by div Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JT! Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 What do you do if you see a space man. Park in it dude. :S Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian Bleech Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 ooooohhhhh i got one 'Did you hear about the michael jackson blackmail alligations?' 'I think its true, i think he was one once!' :S Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Urpedigreechumdog Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 (edited) Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side :S I win :) Edited April 14, 2005 by Urpedigreechumdog Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thechink Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 a horse walks into a bar, the barman says,......... why the long face Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SamHolmes Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 2 fish in a tank... 1 says to the other 'I hope you know how to drive this' :S Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simon Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 Two blondes walk into a bar, the brunette ducks. A bear walks into a bar, places his paw on the bar and pauses for a bit. On the bear placing his order, the barman asks "why the long pawse". That ^^^ one is better when its actually said. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScotchDave Posted April 14, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 (edited) See first post ^^^^^. Edited April 14, 2005 by div Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
philharg Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 hm im gonna have to go for the best joke n hope it wins on u thinking its the worst When is it time for bed in Neverland? When the big hand touches the little hand. michael jackson n janet jackson were at home one evening Janet says "shall we get a pizza and a video" to which michael replies "yeah can we get Alladin" janet then says "no micheal, lets just stick to a pizza n a video" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Interested Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 why was barbie kicked outta the toy box? cause she was caught sitting on pinocchios nose,saying "lie to me,lie to me......." :S :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Nick Riviera Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 A panda walks into a cafe. The panda orders a sandwich, eats it and then fires a gun into the air. On his way out, he tosses a badly punctuated wildlife manual at the confused bartender and directs him to the entry marked "Panda." Whereupon the bartender reads "Panda. Large black-and-white bearlike mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots and leaves." :S" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PythonRider Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 Oh here come the Jackson jokes: Why did michale jackson get food poisioning? Because he ate some 9 year old pork David Beckham rings up michale jackson and says, michale after you trial, do you want to come on our new yauht? Michale replys, Thanks david, i'd love to come on your Cruz! Michale Jackson swore on the popes life he didn't molestor any kids.... Tom :S" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ben_travis Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 this un named forummer watson by anychance, haha, some of these are good carry on ben Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hardman Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 Whats black and white and dangerous? A scunk with a gun. Or infact any black and white animal with a fire arm Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScotchDave Posted April 14, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 (edited) Nah tis not Watson, he's not online the now. :S See first post ^^^^^. Edited April 14, 2005 by div Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smo™ Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 Whats black and white and dangerous? A scunk with a gun. Or infact any black and white animal with a fire arm ← Michael Jackson in a playground whilst in the middle of his 'transition'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrMonkey Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 What's brown and half eaten? The pope's easter egg. 2 Monkeys in a bath one says "OOOOO OOOO AHHH AHHH" The other says "If it's hot put some cold in" Bill and Ben are sitting in a bath Bill says "Flobbadobbadob" Ben says "Fart again and you can get out" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom Booth Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 What's brown and half eaten? The pope's easter egg. ← :S The fbi did a search of micheal jacksons house, in the kitchen the found class b drugs, in the living room they found class c and in the bedroom they found class 5c. Whats the difference bettwen jacko and acne? One dosent come on yor face till you 14 Whats the differences between jacko and a plastic bag? Ones white and harmful to kids, the others a bag. What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson? Get out of my sun! What's brown and often found in children's underpants? Michael Jackson's hand. What is blonde, has six legs, and roams Michael Jackson's dreams every night? Hanson. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Urpedigreechumdog Posted April 14, 2005 Report Share Posted April 14, 2005 What's Black and white and red all over? A newspaper :S Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JT! Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 What's brown and sticky. A stick. :S Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trialsking 55 Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 (edited) whats pink and fluffy :S" ;) pink fluff Edited April 15, 2005 by trialsking 55 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
endofreak Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 What's the difference between a police car and a hedgehog? The hedgehog has it's pricks on the outside!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brisa Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 Two men are playing golf and one asks the other for a light.. He pulls out this rather large lighter from his golf bag and the other man asks where he got that... He points to his golf bag and says he has a genie. So the genie comes out and the his friend asks, can I have one wish because i'm your masters best friend? The genie says sure. The man asks for 1 million bucks... sure enough the genie grants it, the sky darkens the clouds open and .... 1 million ducks fall from the sky. The man says no, I asked for a million BUCKS.. his friend buts in and goes, do you think I asked for a 12" bic. ;) Hideously sad Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Will Arnold Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 whats big, red and eats rocks? a big ,red rockeater ;) what has flipper things, has a beak and is a kind of duckish colour? :S a duck :D haha :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wally Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 (edited) 1. What do you call a sleeping bull? ...............Bulldozer. 2. What squeaks when you pour milk on it? ....................Mice crispies. 3. Whats yellow and smelly? .....................Monkey sick. 4. Knock knock..... Whos there? isabella....................isabella who? Isabella not working. ;) 5. Doctor doctor, i keep thinking i am a pair of curtains. ....... Pull yourself together. Edited April 15, 2005 by wally Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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