anzo Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 Is leaving her, moving out and disconnecting her not an option? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Si-man Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 Getting rid of her is the best thing. To tell you the truth though, if woman got abusive in a relationship and hit me she would probably get a head butt back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anzo Posted January 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 Getting rid of her is the best thing. Might be difficult if there are kids, mortgage or other debts involved thought. However, I'd like to think if I were ever in such a situation she'd be on the doorstep - but of course this isn't always a reality. To be honest you'd better send him this link, I doubt there is much to offer on a forum full of teenagers... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dann2707 Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 I love how the whole men/woman equality rights is a major thing to think about these days but yet it's acceptable for a woman to hit a man but when a man hits a woman things get blown right out of proportion. In no way am I saying I would hit a woman, because I never would, but it's just such bollocks when you really think about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaun H Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 Si - Seriously, you'd hit a woman back? I can't seem to justify it myself and I can see why you say its what you'd do but I can also see why he doesn't want to. I'd never hit my missus with the intention of causing harm (so play-fighting aside) but if she did it to me she'd be on the floor in an arm lock until she calmed the f**k down. Its not right to hit a woman precisely because you are (normally) stronger than them and should use that to stop them passively, not lamp them back. If the guy hasn't got the balls to put her in her place then he should be looking for a way out fast, she doesn't sound like someone who is going to change otherwise. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anzo Posted January 23, 2011 Author Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 yet it's acceptable for a woman to hit a man Is it? Could you honestly give an example of when it's been permitted and 'accepted'? I couldn't, and I don't think many people could. The thing is when it involves women it's overlooked and society has it that men are just expected to get over it - sure, probably the first time, but when it happens everyday because someone text you who she doesn't like, or because you're 5 minutes late home because of the traffic it would begin to get a bit tedious. Hitting her back just isn't an option on two accounts; one, you're dropping to her level. Secondly, as I pointed out, men are expected to get on with it - goggle domestic violence and you'll see they're all support sites for women. My gut instinct is that IF a case went to court after punching a woman because she'd been hitting him everyday - it would more often that not take the side of the female. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dann2707 Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 Is it? Could you honestly give an example of when it's been permitted and 'accepted'? I couldn't, and I don't think many people could. The thing is when it involves women it's overlooked and society has it that men are just expected to get over it - sure, probably the first time, but when it happens everyday because someone text you who she doesn't like, or because you're 5 minutes late home because of the traffic it would begin to get a bit tedious. Hitting her back just isn't an option on two accounts; one, you're dropping to her level. Secondly, as I pointed out, men are expected to get on with it - goggle domestic violence and you'll see they're all support sites for women. My gut instinct is that IF a case went to court after punching a woman because she'd been hitting him everyday - it would more often that not take the side of the female. Not really accepted however much much less frowned upon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinJI Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 He needs to get the hell out of there. There's not really another option. I don't really see how they can stay living together, what are they going to do? go back to normal and pretend nothing happened? that's just not realistic really. He needs to get out of the relationship. Legally speaking the house must belong to either one or the other of them, or be joint. If it's his, spot on, kick her the hell out. If it's hers, he'll have to rely on friends and family for a bit. If it's joint, he can leave, and she'll owe him his share of it. (I'm no solicitor, but I'm pretty sure that's how it works.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MadManMike Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 If my partner was consistently abusing me, I would hit her back. I wouldn't hit a woman for no reason, but if she's constantly abusing him then sure, she needs a firm punch to stop her doing it again. I can't see why that's so frowned upon - she's abusing him. It's not like he's hitting her for fun... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinJI Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 If my partner was consistently abusing me, I would hit her back. I wouldn't hit a woman for no reason, but if she's constantly abusing him then sure, she needs a firm punch to stop her doing it again. I can't see why that's so frowned upon - she's abusing him. It's not like he's hitting her for fun... I completely agree. The trouble is, this removes any legal high-ground you ever had if she starts making false accusations. IE, if you're both bruised and battered she could claim she only hit you in self defence, and as this world only seems to frown on sexism when it's towards women, you can bet they'd believe her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Si-man Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 Only other way is to set a camera up to get some evidence against her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan6061 Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 I'd only hit a woman back if she'd it me first. Surely that's fair game? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sprog! Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 aparently if a women hits you three times you can? personally i never would but... yeah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bikeperson45 Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 I'd be tempted to go along with 'if you can give it, you can take it' attitude. I'd think of it as justice but then I suppose it depends if you like her enough not too. Send her to a counsellor? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JT! Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 I was going to say just leave until i read the hidden camera post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinJI Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 Yeah, hidden camera's are not a bad idea, although there is obviously the risk that she'll beat seven bells of shit out of him if she finds it/them. He's obviously told you about it, is there anyone else who can testify that it's her in the wrong if things get to legal proceedings? It's probably a good idea for him to keep a diary of what's happened, including photos of any visible harm she's caused him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Borat Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 In4MANUPANDLOCKHERINTHEKITCHENUNTILLSHEMAKESMANWICHES. Seriously thought, the diary and hidden camera idea would come in very handy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Revolver Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 In4MANUPANDLOCKHERINTHEKITCHENUNTILLSHEMAKESMANWICHES. Seriously thought, the diary and hidden camera idea would come in very handy! INB4 worn out joke about kitchens and sandwiche- Oh, never mind then. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luke Dunstan Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 Learn to like it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LukasMcNeal Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 What I don't get is surely if there was violence happening the mood in the house would constantly be shit? So it would have to end/get rid? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boswell Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 Smack that bitch up! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simpson Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 I've still got defensive scars on my wrists from when I got in a fight with a girl last summer, girls are getting more confident about hitting guys because they know nothings ever going to happen back, I think you should always be able to pin your woman, I'm a firm believer in the fact that if your girlfriend can beat you up then its time to find a smaller girl! You really have 3 options. - Leave.... easiest way to avoid being hit, she's not going to take you out to the street to beat you up, the reason she does it in the home is because no-one else is there to see it and you feel safe doing what the hell you want. - Pin her down and put that bitch in her place - tell her you wont stand for it while busting the rules 'of' jerico on her spoilt ass. - Or... if your on the ground and cant control her and its a case of you getting beat the shit out of, or her getting a black eye - then i think its acceptable to get her off you.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matt Vandart Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 I rekon women abuse men far more than the other way round, taking psychological abuse into account which can be worse. That sucks for your mate dude. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greetings Posted January 23, 2011 Report Share Posted January 23, 2011 Only other way is to set a camera up to get some evidence against her. That was my initial thought. If he can't report this to the authorities because they disbelief him then he's got to collect some evidence beforehand. Trials Forum - helping you fix fibreglass bathtubs and contain domestic violence since 2002. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ben John - Hynes Posted January 24, 2011 Report Share Posted January 24, 2011 In4MANUPANDLOCKHERINTHEKITCHENUNTILLSHEMAKESMANWICHES. Did you really have to go there? It was a serious thread until that... Trials Forum - helping you fix fibreglass bathtubs and contain domestic violence since 2002. HA, brilliant! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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