Haz Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 Everyone, post the best lies you've told and gotten away with for any period with, or that still stand.Even better, post a picture.GO!I should probably start, I once told my parents that I had posted a parcel that they wanted delivered, but I never did, I just threw it in a hedge. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fixed Pants™ Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 I AM THE KING OF THE CASTLE. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pashley26 Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 to be honest with you, I can't think of any right now. Let me sleep on it ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JonMack Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 to be honest with you, I can't think of any right now. Let me sleep on it ?That makes a change, or maybe it's just another lie, who knows?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam-Griffin Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 Way to go to far, again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pashley26 Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 That makes a change, or maybe it's just another lie, who knows?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheCircus Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 (edited) Is this where I post about my new car I bought? Edited December 10, 2008 by TheCircus Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mowgli Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 last girlfriend didnt know i smoked for 3 yrs of our 3.5 yr relationship, (i told her i had quit for her after a few months of going out) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan6061 Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 Typical TF thing to do. Is that the bandwagon I see in the distance? I think it is! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Has anyone seen my shoe? Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 I told everyone i was 19 on here to fit in and stuff but im actually 49.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simpson Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 i have never lied Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doopdoopbedoop Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 (edited) I have a boxx.+ Edited December 10, 2008 by /JD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ross McArthur Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 One sunny summers morning on the school holidays, brothers Kevin and Ian and myself went for a walk down to Tesco. Kevin being the younger brother of the two. Ian was a couple of years older. So off we set, trifles, crisps, strawberry laces and cakes were all the things we had on our minds to buy so when we went round to our den we could sit and munch them all. Tesco was under construction as an extension was being built. Yet again the building site attracted us youngsters....We could see if we could salvage anything for our den. So in we go, undetected, slipping through the metal mesh boundary into the hazardous playground. A saw here, a few nails there, loads of wood (for a roof) even stuff we could use for seats. Do you know those things on top of Zebra crossings, the yellow lights? Well more specifically the yellow balls that light up that covers the bulb. Well we found one of these too. Have you ever used a can of deodorant and a lighter and made a flame thrower? Or sprayed a shape using hair spray onto an object and lit it and watch it burn? No? just me then?lol Anyway, yea, this is where it starts to become clear what im on about. The yellow cover thing for the zebra crossing we had plus this highly flammable spray glue we came across seemed like a good combination-at the time-to amuse us for a while. So brothers Ian and Kevin, the dare devils, had the two objects in hand. Ian carried a lighter and a Swiss army knife "cos he was cool". In the woods, we sat making big flames with the glue and lighter and wondered if we could do something exiting with this yellow cover, which was a sphere, bigger than a basket ball, probably more the size of a medicine ball. Ian held the sphere which had a hole in it for it to screw onto the pole with the bulb. Kevin had the glue, looked in the hole and started spraying. A good 20-30 seconds went by as the glue started to run out. Im well back by this point. I cant actually remember who had the lighter at this point. Think it was Kevin, the boy was renound for being dim. So inside the sphere is highly flammable aerosol glue floating around and Kevin puts the lighter up to the hole while still looking inside, mesmerized by the mist of the glue. A quick spark of the lighter and a flame appeared in a way I can only describe as a RAF jet engine firing up . Quick as a flash the light show had vanished, as had most of Kevin's eyelashes, eye brows' and fringe. His skin looked yellow and his lips were blistered, he was pretty much Simon Westen'd Stopping, dropping and rolling was the first thing I made that boy do. I was on the ball. He wouldn't have looked out of place in an Elvis Presley concert the way I had him. What the f**k were we going to do with a boy with his face burnt off!!! We weren't meant to be trespassing in the building site so didn't want to get into trouble for that... My house was closest, so once we had pulled out grass with morning dew on it for Kevs face, Ian and I helped him up the road. On the way we had to come up with an excuse, a plan, a scheme, a story anything that would cover up the fact we were idiots playing with fire. On the way to Tesco there is an under pass full of graffiti. I don't know how I did this at the time but I came up with what we were going to say...I knew my mum would phone the police so we all had to get our stories right. Two big boys in the underpass, dressed with jeans and a tracky top, red, with hats on....said "hey" as we walked by, we turned round, and because Kev was the closest to them he got the flame thrower in the face that the "big boys" had!!! then they done a runner. Our plan seemed flawless, we all knew what to say as we knew we would be asked individually. My mum treated him with cold water and damp clothes. She called Kevs dad and he rushed home from work. The police showed up, soon followed by the local paper soon followed by freelance reporters!!! This was getting big!! The police told us that the helicopter had been sent out to look for boys that fitted the description and soon enough we heard it over our house!!! News report on Clyde1 radio station headlined.-"A boy in the Cumbernauld area has been brutally attacked"...on a Sunday bloody morning in a place where nothing ever happens!!!! Jees, how did anyone believe us!! Kevin went to hospital and the injuries weren't that bad thanks to me rolling him in the wet grass. The next day we bought all the papers to see our major hoax! We even got phone calls offering us free counselling for the "horrendous nightmares we were suffering!!!" Anyway that was a long time ago, ive not Seen those boys in years but im sure I heard Kev has a baby now.lol Know one knows the real story either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hobnobs Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 That's more like it haha, epic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anzo Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 (edited) BlahPossibily the best/funniest thing written in this forum! Made me laugh Theres no other feeling like when you carry a lie out to the bitter end, especially when you get yourself in deeper everytime you think you should come clean...excellent when you pull it off though!I must have a couple of decent ones from my childhood...I'll have a think. Edited December 10, 2008 by Baby Pizzle Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James Quigley Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 quick question......How do you post a picture of a Lie? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Max Quinn Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 My best friend in primary school believed i was an invincible robot for 3 years I used to say i could turn him into a robot too just by magic so he asked me to and i did. Needless to say, he didn't feel any different so i said 'you only start noticing it on midnight after the day your changed'. By 3:00 when i was nearly time to go home i would get worried and just change him back again haha, he would get soooo pissed off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Revolver Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 quick question......How do you post a picture of a Lie?Special kind of camera.Or you can get a lens for your current one, providing it fits lenses. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simpson Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 Write short storys for a living? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ross McArthur Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 Write short storys for a living?Ill post another tomorrow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davetrials Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 Im a virgin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simpson Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 Biggest lies always involve how many people youv'e slept with before them lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MadManMike Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 "That was the best one ever" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaffacakes Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 Theres nothing better than a good old lie."Im really sorry, i cant see you tonight. Im _______" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Broomer Posted December 10, 2008 Report Share Posted December 10, 2008 I have a massive Dong! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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