!!()`/D Posted March 17, 2008 Report Share Posted March 17, 2008 Nike made a new trainer for lesbians, its got a long tongue and you can get it off with one finger Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Callum-Luvs-Trials Posted March 17, 2008 Report Share Posted March 17, 2008 Whats funnier than tieing a baby to a clothesline and spinning it round at 200mph?Stoping it with a shovel. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
!!()`/D Posted March 17, 2008 Report Share Posted March 17, 2008 Whats funnier than tieing a baby to a clothesline and spinning it round at 200mph?Stoping it with a shovel.HA That has to be the funniest thing ive heard in ages, harsh but funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mike Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 what did batman say to robin before he got into the batmobile...?Get inthe car robin! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Czar-rider Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"haha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muel Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"hahaMuch lol! Much lol! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STC Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 Kylie Minougue, Robbie Williams and Elton John were walking along a bridge when Kylie slipped and got her head stuck in the railings.....Quick as a flash, Robbie whipped her thong to one side and shagged her. When he was finished he said to Elton "your turn".Elton started crying and said "but my head won't fit in the railings".LMFAODanny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NicP Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 (edited) A man walks into a bar looking quite sad and orders 10 pints, the barman asks "what's up?""i just found out my son is gay " the man repliedThe next day the man walks in again and ordered another 10 so the barman again asks "what's the matter?""my other son is gay" the man saidThe day after that the man walks in and orders a final 10 pints the barman then said to the man" For gods sake doesn't any of your family like pussy""Yes" the man replied ".. My wife".NicP Edited March 18, 2008 by NicP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STC Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 A man walks into a bar looking quite sad and orders 10 pints, the barman asks "what's up?""i just found out my son is gay " the man repliedThe next day the man walks in again and ordered another 10 so the barman again asks "what's the matter?""my other son is gay" the man saidThe day after that the man walks in and orders a final 10 pints the barman then said to the man" For gods sake doesn't any of your family like pussy""Yes" the man replied ".. My wife". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sideburns(dnt ask) Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 A man walks into a bar and orders 10 pints of larger,The barman seems surprised and asks the man if he's celibrating anythingthe man replies yeah my first blowjob.the barman thinking this is a good reason offers to give the man an eleventh pint on the house'the man says don't bother if these 10 don't get rid off the taste nothing will Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NicP Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 What No "Yo Momma" Jokes yet?I'll Start one offYo momma so fat even Dora can't explore herNicP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smoby Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 (edited) A man went up to his wife and asks her what she wanted for her birthday.The lady replied I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in 5 seconds.So 2 days later the man came back and handed her a box.The lady said: I don’t think this will go from 0 to 200 in 5 seconds... The man replied: I'm 100% sure it will!She opened up the box and said...It’s a set of bathroom scales...I know! Go on try them out then! Edited March 18, 2008 by Smoby Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirt jumper jake Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 yo mommas so fat, if she went outside she would get arrested for indecent exposure Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smoby Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 (edited) yo mommas so fat, if she went outside she would get arrested for indecent exposureSorry to be a party pooper but wouldn’t that make her UGLY?Yo mommas so fat every time she turns around it’s her birthday.Yo mummas so fat when she put on her blue swimming costume on and went in the see the Wales shouted "We Are Family!"http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZliC14QUY0Y Edited March 18, 2008 by Smoby Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sidehop Stuart Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 what happened when i dropped my phone into the bath?it started ringing wet!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LukasMcNeal Posted March 18, 2008 Author Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 What No "Yo Momma" Jokes yet?I'll Start one offYo momma so fat even Dora can't explore herNicPYo momas so fat she has to get baptised at seaworldYo mommas so fat when she jumps in the sea the whales sing "we are family" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smoby Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 Yo momas so fat she has to get baptised at seaworldYo mommas so fat when she jumps in the sea the whales sing "we are family"Yo mommas so fat when she jumps in the sea the whales sing "we are family"Beat you to it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
!!()`/D Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 Your mumma so fat that when she got stopped at the airport, she got arrested for having 200 pounds of crack Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LukasMcNeal Posted March 18, 2008 Author Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 A man walks into a pub and says "have you got any grapes?""No, sorry mate this is a pub" The Bartender replies.So the next day the man goes into the pub again and asks "Have you got any grapes?""No mate this is a pub if you ask once more ill nail you to the bar" The Bartender replies.The next day the man goes into the pub and says "You got any nails?""No" says the bartenderThen the other man askes "Well have you got any grapes then?"ROFL! Yo mommas so fat when she jumps in the sea the whales sing "we are family"Beat you to it How i posted before you?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
!!()`/D Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 Yo mumma so ugly she made an onion cry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LukasMcNeal Posted March 18, 2008 Author Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 Yo mumma so ugly she made an onion cry.Not bad but not the funniest Yo momma joke ive heardKeep all the jokes coming please Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twinky trials Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"hahaLMAO havent lol'd so much in ages Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monty221pr Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 Yo mumma so ugly she made an onion cry.Yo mummas so fat it takes 2 trains and a bus to get on her good side:PSam. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LukasMcNeal Posted March 18, 2008 Author Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 Yo mummas so fat it takes 2 trains and a bus to get on her good side:PSam.More Jokediddlyoakles please (sorry for that just been watching the simpsons!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Tom* Posted March 18, 2008 Report Share Posted March 18, 2008 your mums so fat, when i tryed to mount her . . i burnt my arse on the light bulb. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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