My Evening

[george_seamons]

Firstly, excuse long-winded-ness of this post, it's worth a read if you have a few spare minutes though.

It all started out as a fairly normal night...having a piss up at a mates. After a glass of wine, we all decide a kebab would be nice, (it was about 9:30 at this point) so we drive the 15 minute drive into town (he lives on a farm, he's fairly in the sticks). We buy our kebabs, then head back home. On the way back, we see a car at the side of the road, with its hazards on. As we drive past, we could tell something was up, and as we looked to our left, we saw another car in the field beside us (infact it was more below us...there was a 2 foot bank from the road, which sloped down into the field).

Obviously this wasn't right, so we turned round, parked up behind the car, and also put our hazards on, and walked over to the field. As we got there, I shouted if they were ok, to which they replied "No, get here quick". So we jumped down (annoyingly for me, right through a thorny bush...which I was later pulling thorns out of my legs all night!) into the field, and ran over to the voices.

As we approached the scene, you could instantly tell it was very serious. There was a car, a good 20 metres from the point of impact, totally destroyed laying in a field, and a woman...who must have been in her 40's, laying next to it. After a quick initial assesment, asking the couple that were already there, we established that the woman had obviously been going far, far too quick for the corner, lost control big time, flipped the car, and landed in the field.

Nobody witnessed the actual crash, but the couple said that when they got there, the woman was laying next to the car, so she'd obviously gotten herself out, and tried to go and find help. However, she was only about 4 metres away from the car, so hadn't gotten very far. When we arrived, the bloke was under instructions from a paramedic on the telephone, who was explaining how to perform CPR. The man looked really nervous about what he was doing, and it was at this point I stepped forward, because I had recently been on a first aid course, and CPR was one of the things they were quite adamant on teaching.

So I'm there, doing CPR on this woman. After the very first chest compression, I knew she had very little chance of survival. The minute I pushed down on her chest, I could tell all of her ribs were broken. There was no resistance from the bone whatsoever. However, I carried on regardless, the first aid instructor's words clearly echoing and repeating in my head "Once you start CPR, do not stop until the paramedics arrive, no matter how bleak things look".

So I've done my chest compressions, and I move onto the breathes. Now, going from a plastic "Resus-Annie" to a real person is a truly bizarre experience. As I pinch her nose, and move my mouth to hers, you could clearly tell she had been drinking...from the smell of her breath, and unfortunatly in my case...the taste.

This was probably the strangest I've ever felt in my life. Kneeling in the middle of a field, giving mouth to mouth to some complete stranger, praying that she doesn't die. Being surrounded by four of my friends, and the couple which first arrived on scene, all watching on, baited breaths. Somehow the pain in my legs from the thorns didn't seem relevant anymore, no matter how much it hurt. I needed to try and save this woman's life, no matter what.

At some points I questioned why I was carrying on, I knew in the back of my mind she was dead. But like the instructor said...the CPR you perform may well be keeping the victim alive...so I carried on. This was particularly hard after a while, because with each chest compression, her chest got more and more fluid like, and with every push, there was a gargling noise. Coupled with that, each time I blew into her mouth, and let her exhale, fluid would move further and further up her throat. Up until one point, I went to move my mouth away, and the minute my lips broke the seal, fluid gushed from her mouth into mine...causing me to throw up. However, I HAD to carry on...it was like my duty.

So from now on, pretty much everytime I blew into her mouth, she would puke on me. I was literally dreading stopping the compressions and starting the breaths. Pretty much everytime I did it, I gagged. The smell and taste was horrendous. I just thought, at the end of the day, this is somebody's life. If I stopped because it didn't taste very nice, I might potentially kill them.

After about 10 minutes of CPR, the emergency service arrived. The paramedics arrived, and took over from me. The Police then escorted us back to our cars, and interviewed us one by one, taking a statement from everybody at the scene. As I went up to the Police car for my interview, the Policeman shook my hand and congratulated me, said I made a valiant effort, but unfortunatly there was nothing that could be done for her, and she had passed away.

Once we had all been interviewed, we were sent on our way...told to have a stiff drink, and go to bed. As we left, the man who was first at the scene shook my hand and said "Well done son, you did a better job than I was doing".

So we get back to our "gathering" in a somewhat sombre mood. As we get back to the barn, 4 more people had turned up, one of the people in our car had obviously told them what'd happened, because they all looked so concerned. Hugs all round, and then we just sat down and watched American Dad. I really couldn't concentrate though. All I could see was that poor woman's face. I have never seen such a scared face in all my life, her eyes were wide open, and she had an expression which will haunt me for all the time I remember that evening.

I thought I would cope with it ok, after all, there was nothing else I could do for her. As everybody kept pointing out to me, I did my best. However, whilst we were sitting watching American Dad, I went into an almost trance like state. I kept questioning everything that had happened. Why had she done it?

As we were giving her CPR, her mobile phone kept ringing. Nobody knew what to do. Do we leave it, or answer it? How exactly do you go about answering a dead woman's phone? What words could you possibly say to the person on the other end?!

From the information we had, we pieced together that she had had an argument with her partner, and gone on a drunken drive. Whether or not this was suicide, or just a drunken miscalculation, we will never know. But from where the car was, and the distance she ended up from the point of impact, she was going at some considerable speed, And I mean far, far too fast. The corner is the entry of a 30mph zone. You can do the corner at anything up to about 50...after that you start to lose grip. Judging from the length of the skid marks, she was doing far greater than 60mph. At a guess, I'd put it closer to 80-90mph.

As I was sitting there, so many things went through my head. This woman was the age where she could have had children...maybe even grandchildren. She left so many people in her life that night. To go from having all those people, to dying in a field on her own, to dying with 6 total strangers surrounding her. What was going through her head as she lay there? What were her final thoughts as she lay there looking at the stars?

That night really really shook me up. I can't get her face out of my head. Everytime I sleep, its there. I told mum what happened this morning, and just burst into tears. It was such a helpless night, nobody could do anything, yet it somehow felt like I could have done more, even though in reality I know I couldn't.

If you managed to get this far without giving up...first of all well done! Secondly, I hope it taught some of you a lesson - Never drink drive. Its not just your life you f**k up. You f**k your family's lives, and you mess innocent stranger's heads up!

Coupled with that, think about how you're driving. We all get pissed off from time to time, and its easy to take aggression out on the road. But judging by the results of last night, its really not worth it. That woman lost so much last night. And because of what? An argument? Seems such a waste of life.

I'll probably add more later if I can think of anything. But yeah, hope my ramblings were of some interest to somebody!

[dirtbiker]

That's a gripping read and you should be extremely proud of yourself, not many others would have had the balls to do that.

Hope it doesn't mess you up too much, you should know that you did everything you could.

[george_seamons]

That's a gripping read and you should be extremely proud of yourself, not many others would have had the balls to do that.

Hope it doesn't mess you up too much, you should know that you did everything you could.

Thankyou.

In all honesty, I really surprised myself. I never thought I would be the kind of person to take control in a situation such as that. Let alone to have that much determination to carry on against everything!

I'm ok I guess...its only just starting to sink in though, its a truly bizarre feeling. Something I'd quite happily never experience again!

[Ali C]

I cant put myself in your situation and feel how you feel, so all I'll say is well done, you deserve some respect! Try not to dwell on it too much, paramedics have to see things like that (and worse) often, hopfully you'll get over it soon.

[poopipe]

well done mate,

seriously.

not everyone keeps a straight head in that sort of situation so you ought to be properly proud of yourself.

not much more I can say. just keep your head on straight for the next few weeks-doesn't sound like anybody couldve done anything more.

[downhill_rob2@hotmail.com]

I honestly dont know what to say... You acted like a hero, trying to save someones life, not many people could do that! Well done man!

I just had my First Aid course yesterday, now i know how to perform CPR, i just hope to never have to use it, cause i dont know if i would be able to use it...

My mate died in a car crash 2 nights ago, about 100meters from my house, the road he crashed on was blocked off, i didnt know why, intill the radio last night, i feel for his parents

[Adam L]

Very well done man, you tried your best but her injuries were obviously too serious for her to be saved.

You did the right thing to carry on with the CPR.

If you don't think about it too much it shouldn't mess with your head.

Hope i don't experience anything like that.

Adam.

[omgnoseat]

I'm seriously impressed with that.

I can imagine that you feel that way now, I hope you will get over it soon.

[Dr. Nick Riviera]

There isn't really anything to be added here, but in all fairness, that was a very brave thing to do. well done.

[Caleb]

first off it was real good of you to even stop your car,

secondly to risk a lot by trying to save a strangers life is beyond words.

id try to get your mind off the woman somehow or over, afterall it totally had nothing to do with you made more of an effort thatn any one else !

good on you

[CurtisRider]

Like i said earlier, i'm extremely proud of you buddy, you did good.

I'm so glad that i stayed at home for a shower whilst you guys got kebab (it was my barn we were having the gathering in) cos i don't quite think i could handle it as well as all of you, felt so bad for not believing you initially, its very messed up. I was majorly gutted me and pip weren't allowed through to come see you guys when we drove up.

Anyway, see you soon buddy x

[Fixed Pants™]

f**k that really was a gripping read, coupla small tears came out at some points, and i have to say, you're a f**king good man, that's serious, SERIOUS courage and determination, and just remember, you did your absolute best and there's no way you're responsible for it, EVER. You truly deserve a medal.

We're doing similar stuff in PSCE (or what ever it is now) and it's pretty helpful, just gotta have a very strong mind to be able to do all of it in such a terrible situation. Hence why you'll be fine soon, i think we can safely say it would mess someone up for a week or so if someone else experienced it, don't worry about it, you'll be fine soon.

Massive respect.

[liam-pantera]

you are a hero

its people like you that actualy give this country a good name and you deserve some kind of reward .

i know this kinda stuffs traumatic and takes a while to get over it but its an importnat lesson no-one should ever forget , so well done

[Dan Campbell]

I will only echo what people have said already, you should be extremely proud, you carried on despite everything you knew and was happening. You did what you could with the training you had.

I hope you find it easier to sleep and carry on soon, you deserve to be able to.

[Bionic Balls]

hats off to you...you're a great example

[Trix]

Well done, not many people have any idea how to give CPR, but because you did this first aid coarse you were able to help, unfortunately this woman did passed away, but what you got to think about is she would have passed away whether you got there or not, you did keep her going for that much longer, you did nothing wrong.

I know it would be hard for you to think proudly of this situation because of the outcome, but just remember you did all you could to the best of your abilities, so you should be happy to know you can carry out these acts to help people in the future if needed.

I believe the best way to feel better about this and not remember it as a bad situation is to talk about it with your family / friends which you have started doing, if you still feel very bad about it in say a month, then do go to your doctors or try and get in contact with maybe samaritans samaritans site Just for advice what to do, or just get in contact with them now if you feel you need to.

[basher]

Well i found it that griping i had to read it all, your a amzingly lad to do what you did stepping forward and to carry CPR with the fluid comeing out of her mouth is something to be more than proud of, i should think most people wouldnt even stepped forward because of fear and im sure most people couldnt of carried on giving CPR. You shouldnt be blameing yourself in anyway but more proud of yourself that you did what most other people couldnt or wouldnt have done and something you didnt have to do either you could of just stood there in shock which i should think your friends where in. But you didnt and most of you didnt give up which shows your a really great guy and im sure if the womans family could they would thankyou for not giving up even if you did no she was dead and even if you couldnt save her you still give her a chance which it seems she wouldnt of had with the other man and thats the most important thing that you gave her the chance and not stood by and watched. So i wouldnt kick yourself about it be proud of what you did. Im sure in a few weeksthings will be back to normal.

[clarkytrials]

Well done indeed thats extremely brave of you as well

[1a2bcio8]

That was very well written, I think. To be honest, you've left me with a sense of shock at what you experienced. I really respect your efforts which I'm not so sure I could done myself in the same situation. When I was kid I saw a women accidently reverse into her husband as he was loading his golf clubs into the car. The sound of his head hitting the concrete was not nice. I was unable to do anything, except stand and stare, despite the fact I was standing nearest.

Anyway, I hope you feel better soon. I know how traumatic events can effect you. I guess perhaps you might have to wait a little whilefor the majority of those sensations to fade although I suppose you'll never really lose all of them. At least that'll probably mean you'll never drink and drive.

[spode@thinkbikes]

Nicely written. I didn't wander off once!

An amazing evening that I'm sure you'll never forget.

[MadManMike]

Reading this is the first thing thats taken my mind off my bike being stolen.

Makes me realise there's more to life than bikes.

Well done mate, you did all you could and thats more than some people could have done.

Hats off to you, be happy you tried, not sad that she passed away.

[ConnorPowell]

Well done man, You done all that you could.

the description was that good i could put a whole picture together in my mind.

you did well.

[Ash-Kennard]

dont really know what to say to be honest.

well done i guess

[Synergy]

i think like a lot of people im finding it hard to write a worthy reply to your post, all i can say is the same as others well done you done a very brave thing and many a people will be proud of you.

[Muel]

That was really moving, well done.

I wouldn't have drink drived anway, but that just served to show the damage it causes to everyone you ever come into contact to.