Pashley26

How the f**k has Tinder decided it's now going to limit my likes unless I pay £7.99 a month? c**ts.

Not what I said, but as you were.

f**king Golf. Decided not to start earlier, couldn't work out why. Then when it did start twenty minutes later the indicators wouldn't work. Then driving it home, every time I put main beams on the stereo turned off. Dafuq.

My mates just picked this up (at midnight). Can't wait to have a go in it later on! Rolllll on the 1st of March.

Tinder is unbelievably heroic for stuff like that. It's so much easier being single now than it ever used to be, it's fantastic.

Just man the f**k up guys, all this sleeping there bullshit. Prawn and I did it in a day from Eastleigh. Frenchman did a Donnington track day and drove there and back from Plymouth in a day. Get a pair.

Hilarious. I work with somebody I absolutely hate, he has a history of sexual harassment in the work place. I dislike him intensely. This customer I've been hanging out with was interviewed for a job the other day, and whilst she was there he asked her if 'we're together' apparently the reply was 'no of cause not, what are you going on about?' Well, since then he's been texting her all the time. She's told me about it and said that it's a bit weird, but whatever he's just being friendly assuming she's probably going to get the job. She really isn't now. So on Wednesday she text me saying 'OMFG, something absolutely retarded has just happened. Call me when you're free.' I didn't call her, I CBA with any hassle and bollocks and to be honest I'm not really that interested in her life. About four hours later I get a screenshot time stamped for the time she told me to call her. Basically a text from the guy I work with straight up saying 'so if you're not with him then how about we f**k some time?' accompanied by a snapchat of his dick. In the works toilets judging by the tiles. Ummmm?! So I act cool, like I know nothing. Later in the afternoon he's sat at my desk and his phone goes, he shows me the screen and says 'ooh look who it is'. Like I give a f**k. Then he sits there going 'oh hey honey, how are you doing darling? how's your day? what are you doing tonight babe?' And I'm like...'WTF? I don't give a f**k, this is clearly a personal phone call so take it the f**k outside.' Thursday she asked me if I wanted to go out for a Chinese on Friday night to than me for taking her out this weekend I say 'yeah fair enough, has the nobhead at work stopped hassling you? I heard you on the phone to him the other day, so I assume that's all sweet now?' Then she tells me that he prank called her 10+ times in a row before she phoned him back. He was clearly trying to set it up so she rang him whilst he was sat at my desk. Again, like I give a f**k? I get into work this morning and find out that he's told the entire dealership that I'm gay? (I'm not) and that's why we aren't together. And that I told her that on Monday night, and that's why I didn't f**k her when she came round to get all the stuff she left in my bag from the weekend. So I phone her, and ask her if she said it. Obviously she didn't. So I have it out with him, it gets back to the area manager. Area manager rings me up and asks WTF's going on, and what all this is about. So I basically told him not to worry, he was just joking and that it was all dealt with and he didn't need to worry. Area manager tells him to back the f**k off, stop being a total bellend and to wind his neck in. He tells me to make sure I keep her sweet and give her no reason to make a complaint towards the company, which I obviously won't. Later on this afternoon, I get a phone call from her. 'He won't stop f**king phoning me. Im going into the shop to get a new sim card, if he doesn't stop f**king ringing me I'm phoning your HR department. This is f**king stupid, I don't want to be f**king a married 40 year old paki with three kids. WTF is he on?' 'I'll sort it.' So I phoned the area manager and I told him 'I f**ked a customer, became mates with her, he got jealous, basically stalked her and has been harassing her ever since. I think she's pretty pissed off about it all, but she's totally cool with me. Not my fault and not my problem, I can f**k whoever I want. The problem has come that he's now jealous and has been on self destruct mode for the last week.' Area manager said 'f**king hell mate, what a mess. You're not in the shit, unless she complains about you too. I'll sort him out, you look after her and make sure she knows it's being dealt with before HR hear about this shit.' f**k knows what's going to happen now, he'll probably get fired because he's already been moved from two dealerships for similar shit. Fully hilarious though, I've been waiting for something to bite him on the arse for absolutely ages. On the plus side, I'm going to have a Chinese and get laid tonight. On the down side, I'll probably not be doing her again for a while until this cluster f**k at work has been dealt with. Lols.

They are a slightly different shade of grey, but after much tarting up and many products they have come out a much better match. From any more than a meter away you wouldn't notice. The car has had a pretty shoddy respray, so everything from the bottom of the windows up is a little bit brighter than the rest of the car, so no matter what I do with the doors the paint is always going to be a bit shit. I'm seriously considering just blowing £2000 from my savings to have the whole car blown over in Volcano Black (same colour as Prawns A3), it's so solid that I think a respray wouldn't actually be a loss of money. £1500 on the car, £1000 on doing it up mechanically and £1500-2000 on a paint job, £4500 doesn't buy you much in two door 1.8t Mk2 circles. And certainly not a freshly painted K04'd car. We'll see.

Well anybody who is local is more than welcome to stay at mine on Wednesday night for a joint convoy.

Do it.

Rapid de-chav at your services. - Today was a frustrating but productive day, I got what I needed to get done in the end. It's just so aggravating when the rain is so on and off, and you just get into something and you've got to stop because it starts chucking it down. The other day I started peeling off the carbon wrapped bonnet. Because it was offensive. With it came half of the paint, revealing an incredibly faded and damaged bonnet. I wish I hadn't started it! So I had that to finish today too. Got up at half 7, jacked the suspension up and bled the brakes. Then I finished peeling off the bonnet, whilst it was chucking it down. So I washed it quickly too fairy thoroughly. Then took it for a test drive. I'm happy with the ride height now it has settled, it's visibly low. But not stupidly low, and it doesn't scuff or bottom out any more. This has however opened up a few other issues, now that I can properly drive the car the front end is in real need of a rebuild. The steering is incredibly wandery (is that even a word?) at the front, and the suspension is frankly terrible. They're only cheap coilovers, and I know I was spoilt with the HR coilovers on my S3, but these are truly atrocious. So they'll need changing, and I may as well polybush things whilst I'm there and convert to a manual quick rack. I'll get collecting parts... Then I went down to the workshop to put the car on the ramp and spanner check a few bits and see if it was just loose stuff. It wasn't. Then I hooned it home, and all was going well. Engine felt strong, brakes felt better now they're bled. Yeah, happy. Around about now I'm going to start talking about cleaning things, so if you're of a miserable disposition about cleaning cars then press the ALT button and F4 at the same time. So I got home and washed the car again. Then broke out my best friend. The bonnet was SO bad. This took many hours. Now, not to blow my own trumpet.... But that's a total transformation from the day I bought it! Happy with that

Holy f**king shit balls. Mother of all f**ks. The f**ker of mothers. The guy is my new hero.

I'm glad to have been of service to you; hopefully I've pissed you off proportionally to the level of pissoffery I've felt from you haha. I've bought the right grille now, don't worry. It's in the post. I've also just spent the last half hour enquiring about cars being broken and getting atlas grey panels for it. Ffs.

Thanks. The tow bar just adds to the comedy value. I want to get a sticker made that says ''Want a tow? You might get there quicker?'' with an arrow pointing to the tow bar, just for comedy lols. If I remove the tow bar, I've got to replace the lower bumper. If I replace the lower bumper I should really replace the bumper. If I replace the rear bumper I should probably do the front bumper too. If I replace the front and rear bumpers it will look even worse having a passenger door and bonnet the wrong shade, so I'll have to replace those. Then I'll have to sort the lacquer peel on the drivers rear 1/4 because it will let the rest of the car down. Then the rust on the drivers door will annoy me so I'll replace that. Then I'll get the hump that half the clips on the sill trims are broken and replace them. Then it will annoy me that the outside looks nice but the inside is shit. So I'll replace the door cards, but then they will look new and the seats will look rubbish, so I'll end up replacing them. Then I'll get annoyed that there are holes in the dash top and I'll replace that, then I'll get the hump that the centre console has a broken clip so it rattles and I'll replace that. Then the cracked handbrake surround will annoy me and I'll replace that too. Then before you know it I've spent £0000's on a £1500 shed that's still only worth £1500 and it'll owe me weeks worth of my life.

I quite like the black wheels. Because. Black wheels look chavy. The dent in the rear bumper looks like I don't care about it. The exhaust looks chavy. The tow bar is hilarious. The mismatched body panels make it look like a shed. But it's going to be properly fast when I'm done with it. Sleeper innit.

Today was a good day, tomorrow will be better. Took these into work. Fitted them in my lunch break. Put them in the Panda. Went to Halfords and bought a set of 13cm and 6x4' speakers and a head unit. I also bought a new bar, a wire brush, a pritt stick of copper grease. I fitted the speakers. I fitted the wheels. I absolutely annihilated it to Prawns to pick up the jack and his C spanners. Then I absolutely annihilated it back home. Then whilst the bonnet was warm I peeled the rest of the vinyl off the bonnet. Tomorrow I am raising and levelling the suspension, bleeding the brakes, machine polishing.

Well that should put the handling back in line!

Electrical testing requires a few little tools and bodges, it wasn't that you weren't capable of doing it but more than if you don't know how to do it you've probably never done it so potentially wouldn't have the electrical testers required. I can't help when it comes to wiring, my wiring knowledge is limited to 60's cars which have 10 wire looms haha.

Like what? Name one job somebody else has done for me in the last year?

To be fair, this sounds horrible but I don't mean it that way... If I have to tell you how to test a relay, you probably won't be able to do it and have the right bits to test it. I'd just fire in a new indicator relay and cross your fingers. Do the hazards still work?

Sounds like a relay to me.

Changed the turbo exhaust gaskets last night, the downpipe gasket was leaking and I was pretty certain the manifold to turbo gasket was a cheapie one. The only gaskets were shitty multi layer ones, and both were f**ked. Totally. The manifold to turbo gasket must have been leaking quite badly, because the car feels SO much nicer now. Much smoother. It used to cut out if you rev'd and built up boost then took your foot off the throttle it wouldn't idle and it would just die. I'm not sure how changing the gaskets could have fixed this, so I'm going to opt for coincidence but it is idling perfect every time now. Excuse the rattliness, it is a 1.8t after all haha. I bet all you K04 1.8t boys wish it was this easy to get to the turbo on your cars 20 minute job max to change both gaskets.

I did get a 50" TV in the back of it, so maybe. I'll do some measuring.

If I use LOADS of it, tape it front to back, side to side, layer some marking tape across the front of the roof surround and across the front of the roof, wrap it through the doors, everything. It'll be fine. I've been offered such a good deal on the roof I've got to buy it.